Vegestation: Tummy Trouble!
by Chuquita
Summary: ChiChi's decided to teach Veggie a lesson on trying to steal Goku once and for all using Videl's ImitationTummy3000. But will Goku be able to stand by while she goes through with it? And will Veggie be able to hide the strange goings on with his belly and
1. Chichi's evil Scheme l Veggie's Tummy

**Author's Note: Hi everybody! Welcome to Fic #97! Special thanks to mkh2 for title-related help!  
****_WARNING_ - this fic is rated PG for fake tummy-related incidents, if anything bothers you please click the back button on your browser :)**

4:00 PM 11/24/2004  
E-mail:  
By: Chuquita  
**Quote of the Week**: -_from dUbz #273 "An Evil Maze! What's Inside of Buu!?"  
__Goku: Isn't it worth you and I being stuck together if we can beat Buu?  
__Veggie: Hmmph. No, I prefer to be the captain of my own ship._

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**Chuey's Corner**:  
**Goku:** Heehee, Captain Veggie's ship's gonna get a new addition!  
**Vegeta:** (pales) I have a feeling things have not fallen in my favor this time.  
**Chuquita:** (grinning) What do you mean by that?  
**Vegeta:** Well, the title is a mixture of my name and the word gestation, which is a synonym for conception; and then there's the Q.O.T.W, and then there's Kakarrotto several lines up. (uneasily) So am I correct in thinking I lost the battle of this fic's plotline.  
**Chuquita:** ...  
**Vegeta:** Chu?  
**Chuquita:** WELCOME to the 97th fic everybody!  
**Goku:** HOORAY! (holds up fingers) Three more to go and then we'll be at #100!  
**Chuquita:** (grins) It's so exciting!  
**Goku:** (happily) Yes it is!  
**Vegeta:** ... (twitches) I'll take that sudden change of subject as a yes.  
**Chuquita:** Well, you see Veggie, this fic idea's been sitting in my head for the past half of the year, and when I originally got it it WAS going to be Goku but then stuff happened and character development and it wouldn't work as well with him since  
we're past the 'oujo' thing and you are pretty funny and....  
**Vegeta:** (flatly) You're going to make me be the one with the "fakebelly", aren't you.  
**Chuquita:** ...maybe? (cheesy smile)  
**Vegeta:** GAH!? (falls over) (gets up, distraught) I can't believe this! Two years ago this NEVER would have happened!Throughout this entire year I've been slowly losing my platonic seme-ness. (starting to panic)  
**Goku:** (worriedly pats Veggie's shoulders) Veggie that's not true--  
**Chuquita:** (sweatdrops) He's just over-exaggerating in hopes I'll feel sorry for him and switch it back over to you, Son-kun.  
**Vegeta:** (pauses in the middle of an over-dramatic pose of terror) ...it's not working then?  
**Chuquita:** Not really.  
**Vegeta:** Aw... (plops back down in his chair) A-cursed predicament. I think I'd almost be better off in the future.  
**Goku:** (looks around) Oh yeah, we did time-travel back to the present again, didn't we?  
**Chuquita:** Yup! (to audiance) Sorry about the whole "present" "future" "present" "future" "present" thing, guys. (nervous laugh)  
**Vegeta:** (sweatdrops) Speaking of indecisive.  
**Chuquita:** Heh-heh... (to Veggie) Hey at least your "addition" is a fake one.  
**Vegeta:** The world would probably explode if it were real.  
**Chuquita:** Hai...there's a couple things in that category actually.  
**Vegeta:** And you're SURE you can't let Kakarrotto be the one to receive said fake addition?  
**Chuquita:** (sighs) It wouldn't work the same as with you Veggie. If I had written this fic BEFORE "Kakarroujo"--  
**Vegeta:** (smirks) --which in my humble opinion you should've--  
**Chuquita:** --then it probably would've been Son-kun.  
**Vegeta:** (glances over his shoulder in nervous annoyment) I blame two text documents in the folder to our right...  
**Chuquita:** (sweatdrops) Shush. I told you its fake.  
**Vegeta:** Does the me in the fic know that?  
**Chuquita:** (grins) Not right away...  
**Vegeta:** (pales)  
**Goku:** Heeheehee.  
**Vegeta:** o.O Why are you giggling?  
**Goku:** (sits back up) (blank expression) ...  
**Vegeta:** (to Chu) And you're SURE his mind is back to normal.  
**Chuquita:** Yeah...the sudden Kaka-I.Q jump...I'm still not COMPLETELY sure what that was attributed to. But I'm pretty sure he's back to normal.  
**Vegeta:** "Pretty sure", huh.  
**Chuquita:** Yup!  
**Vegeta:** (looks over at Goku)  
**Goku:** :)  
**Vegeta:** (cheeks flush red) Well....alright...  
**Chuquita:** And now onto the fic!

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**Part 1 Chapter Titles: What's that? Introducing the ImitationTummy3000! l Chi-Chi's Malicious Prank l Sparring with Veggie – Goku's Terrifying Premonition l Parade l Bulma VS the Kitchen! Fusions to the Rescue! l Plushie: Exhibit A l It's just a Game l Turles – Keeper of Secretive Non-Platonic Knowledge l CLOSED l Uneasy Accomplice l Lump l It's Only "Pretend" Anger l Training Cures what Ails You l Suspicious Apperance l Stop Turles! The Secret of Timeline 8 l Raditsu the Unsuspecting Backup? "But Turles Likes You!" l Allergic Reaction to What? l **

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Summary: Chi-Chi's decided to teach Veggie a lesson on trying to steal Goku once and for all using Videl's ImitationTummy3000 But will Goku be able to stand by while she goes through with it? And will Veggie be able to hide the strange goings on with his belly and simply hope its nothing more than a stomach-ache or will he be forced to deal with one of his biggest kaka-related fears of all? And what will he do when he finds out the added tummy-weight is a fake?

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**Vegeta:** Cheer and jump with joy?  
**Chuquita:** (sweatdrops) ...  
**Goku:** Heehee..Veggiestummy.

* * *

" Hmmhmmhmm... " Goku hummed cheerfully to himself as he sat at the kitchen table scribbling on a piece of paper. 

Goten hopped up onto the chair next to him, " Hey Toussan? Whatcha doin? "

" Hee— its a story! " Goku held up the papers, all of which had childish, plushie-like doodles on them, " About my

**Veggie!** "

" Oh joy. " Chi-Chi flatly remarked as she opened the fridge.

Goku ignored the sarcasm and held up the first page for Goten, which featured a chibi Veggie standing ontop of a

small Bejito-sei, " Once upon a time there was a little ouji named Veggie. Veggie was good and had lots of people who luved

him! "

" Ah, fiction. " she commented. Goten sweatdropped.

" But then one scary day, Veggie was kidnapped by Freeza and his family and home were destroyed. " the second page

showed a crying chibi Veggie in what looked like deep-space.

" Awww. " the chibi looked sad.

" Freeza made Veggie do lots of bad things he didn't want to do, and that made Veggie even sadder. " the following

page was of chibi Veggie cleaning windows, teenage Veggie moping the floor, and adult Veggie folding clothes.

" The Ouji blew up planets and decimated entire galaxies all over the universe! " Chi-Chi exclaimed.

" Not in Toussan's story. " Goten chirped.

Goku grinned at her, " Hee— my little Veggie would never do such terrible things, Chi-chan. "

" In YOUR little version of the world maybe. " she sighed.

" But then one day Veggie escaped to earth and was saved from Freeza by me! " Goku held up a picture of himself

glomping a saiyajin-armor-wearing Vegeta, " And then we beat Freeza TOGETHER! And after that we beat the Big Meanie

TOGETHER! " the next drawing was of Freeza and Brolli who both had x's for eyes, " Veggie was so happy to be free of Freeza

and the Big Meanie that he and our fusion-babies moved in with me and we all lived happily ever after! The End! " Goku's

final doodle was of him, Vegeta wearing a little blue gi, Vejitto, and Gogeta standing infront of the Son home with smiles

on their faces.

" Haha. " Goten applauded him.

" Goku-san, I love you, but that story was near-completely untrue. " Chi-Chi sweatdropped.

" ? " Goku tilted his head at her.

" ▫Ding-Dong▫! "

" Niichan's here! " Goten excitedly hopped out of his seat and ran to the front door. He opened it to reveal Gohan

and Videl standing in the doorway, " Hi niichan! "

" Hey Goten. " Gohan smiled, " How've you been? " the couple came inside.

" Great! "

" Wow this is heavier than advertised. " Videl sweatdropped.

Chi-Chi smiled at them, " Hi gu---▫GASP▫! " she froze in shock.

Gohan and Videl stood there like deer in headlights.

" You didn't tell her, did you? " Videl laughed uneasily.

" Oh my goodness I'M a GRANDMOM! " Chi-Chi gushed excitedly.

" ... " ▫

" I mean--YOU'RE pre--- "

" --stomach looks like it is ready to explode! " Goku gasped in shock. Chi-Chi sweatdropped and Videl's cheeks

flushed, " What did you EAT? "

" She didn't "eat" anything, she's pregnant! " Chi-Chi pointed out, trying to keep her eager grin down to a minimum.

" No I'm not. "

" ...eh? " Chi-Chi blinked, a fuse blowing in her brain, " What did you say? I couldn't hear over the sounds of my

hopes for the future being shattered into a million tiny pieces. "

Gohan walked behind Videl and lifted the bottom back of her shirt, then pressed something and instantly the addition

turned from Videl's skin-tone to a transparent object which tumbled out onto the floor.

" ... " Chi-Chi stared at the object, a small depression cloud hovering over her head, " Oh. "

" Oooh, what is it? " Goku picked the object up and poked it. It felt soft and had the density of an actual stomach.

The device also had a strong warmth radiating from it.

" It's called the ImitationTummy3000. " Videl explained, " It's a device that helps you prepare for what it'll be

like once you are pregnant and can even enlarge itself over an actual 9-month period. "

" We bought it at the baby store across the street from Capsule Corp. " Gohan added.

Goku took his orange gi top and blue t-shirt off, then carried the ImitationTummy3000 back into the kitchen with him,

a content little smile on his face.

" Where's he going? " Videl blinked.

" I have a pretty good idea.. " Gohan sweatdropped.

" So...if you bought something like that...you must be getting ready TO have the first of my many MANY grandchildren,

correct? " Chi-Chi asked.

" Well... " Gohan blushed, embarassed.

" Yeah... " Videl blushed as well.

" GREAT! " Chi-Chi whipped out an incomprehendably long piece of paper, " I happen to have a small list of names from

which you could possibly consider-- " she started out.

" TA-DA! " Goku exclaimed cheerfully from the doorway.

Chi-Chi whipped her head around to see him.

" Look Chi-chan! I'm havin' a baby! "

" ... " Chi-Chi's eyes rolled into the back of her head and she promptly fainted, hitting the ground with a thud.

" That wasn't exactly the re-ply I was going for. " Goku scratched his head, confused.

" Toussan I really wouldn't advice you wearing that. " Gohan motioned to the ImitationTummy3000 which was currently

around the large saiyajin's middle making him look as big as Videl had several minutes ago.

" ▫Knock▫knock▫ " the front door knocked again.

Goku glomped warmly onto his 'stomach' only to have Gohan quickly shut the device down and yank it off him, " Hey! "

he pouted, saddened, " I liked that. "

" Well if you like it Kaasan wouldn't. " Gohan sighed.

" That sentence actually a-pplies to a lot of things. " Goku nodded thoughtfully.

Gohan opened the door, " Hello? "

" Hi there. " Vegeta smirked.

" ▫GASP▫, VEGGIE! " the large saiyajin gushed and glomped onto him from the front, " Mmmm—— "

" Uh.. " the ouji felt his cheeks start to flush red, " Kakarrotto why are you half-naked? "

" Better the top than the bottom, little Veggie. " Goku chirped.

" This is true. " the ouji said thoughtfully, then squeezed out of Goku's grasp, " Hello everyone. "

" Hi. "

" Hi Vegeta. " the couple sweatdropped.

" Hi Veggie-san! " Goten waved to him.

" I just happened to be in the neighborhood when I heard Onna's lifeless body hit the floor, so I decided to come in

and check to see if she's still in the land of the living or if Kakarrotto needed someone to console him in a state of

kaka-depression. " Vegeta said casually.

" Silly Veggie, Chi-chan's still alive. " Goku motioned to her, " I just made her faint! "

" Really? " Vegeta said, intregued as he walked over to Chi-Chi and poked her in the arm, " Exactly what did you do,

Kakarrotto? Break a rule in her presence? Talk back to her? Stand up for yourself? "

" Haha, no, I--mmph?! " Gohan slapped his hand over Goku's mouth and made a shhing motion.

" Hmm...now I'm REALLY intregued. " the smaller saiyajin rubbed his hands together.

" Vegeta would you excuse Toussan and I for a moment? " Gohan asked, laughing nervously.

" Of course. " he grinned wickedly.

Gohan pulled Goku out into the hallway, " Toussan! You can't tell Vegeta about the Tummy3000! " he whispered loudly.

" Why not? " Goku asked, confused.

" Because! He's Vegeta! He'll find a way to twist things around so he can use that device for his own mischievous and

often-well-thought-out deeds! " the demi-saiyajin explained.

" But I don't like to keep things from my Veggie. " Goku frowned, " If there's something important that I think

Veggie should know I tell him. Un--unless of course its against the rules to tell him...and I don't think think this

particular situation is. "

Gohan sighed, " Please just keep quiet about it. If Vegeta finds out such a product exists he'll-- " Gohan paused.

" Yes? " Goku said, baffled as to why Gohan had stopped speaking. They both looked up to see Vegeta standing on the

ceiling above them, " VEGGIE?! "

" Just passing through. " the ouji continued his stroll down the ceiling and walked into the bathroom, closing the

door behind him.

" How did he do that? " Gohan sweatdropped.

" My little Veggie's so full of surprises! " Goku clasped his hands together, delighted.

The little ouji emerged from the bathroom a minute later, this time on the floor, " So Kakarrotto, as long as Onna's

indisposed at the moment, how would you like to go out for a short spar? "

" YEAH! " the larger saiyajin gushed, " I would luv to go spar with Veggie! "

" Well then, I guess we're off. " Vegeta led Goku out of the hallway, then glanced over his shoulder at Gohan, " You

don't have a problem with that, do you Gohan? "

" No....and what happened to "Kaka-spawn"? " Gohan cocked an eyebrow.

" You surpassed that several months ago after you freed yourself from Onna's evil twisted grasp. "

" You mean when I got married and moved out of the house? " Gohan sweatdropped.

" Exactly. " Vegeta smirked, then opened the backdoor, " Come Kakarrotto, we only have so much time before Onna

recovers consiousness. "

" K! " Goku chirped and followed him outside.

" You just let them go like that? " Videl said, surprised.

" What? I'm not paranoid about Vegeta like Kaasan is. " Gohan glanced back at her, " He's sneaky but he's far from

evil. "

" That's it Gohan! Assert your independence! " Vegeta applauded him from the backyard.

Gohan sweatdropped and Videl chuckled at him.

Outside Goku picked up Vegeta and teleported them off to their usual sparring site.

" Uhhhhh..ohhhh.. " Chi-Chi's eyes flickered open. Her nose cringed a particular smell that still lingered in the

room, " Ouji. " she glared up at the ceiling, then lept to her feet, " Where is he! " Chi-Chi demanded.

" Oh, Vegeta left already. You just missed him. " Videl pointed towards the backdoor.

" Did he. " she said dangerously, " And where's Goku-san? "

" ... " Gohan and Videl backed up towards the front door.

" Well, see you later Kaasan! " Gohan grinned cheesily at her, about to close the door on her.

" STOP! "

" ! " Gohan froze in place, the oppressiveness starting to hover over him again like a bad deja vu.

" Gohan. " Chi-Chi said warningly.

" Um, he left as well? "

" By himself or with the Ouji? "

" ...define "with". "

" UGH! " Chi-Chi slapped herself on the forehead, " Evil little Ouji, I swear if I wasn't around he'd start

manipulating EVERYONE within listening distance. " she groaned.

" He just took Mr. Son to go spar, Chi-Chi. " Videl said.

" How do you know! "

" Because..that's what he told us? "

" EXACTLY! "

" ? " ▫

" You can't just take the Ouji's word for it! He's a genius at spinning lies upon lies. A mastermind of nefarious

deeds! The Ouji is one of the main reasons I want you to have so many children! So one of them will take Goku-san in once

I've passed on so he doesn't get passed on to the Ouji! " Chi-Chi paced back and forth, upset.

" Kaasan calm down. " Gohan said, worried.

" The Ouji's been dragging Goku-san deeper and deeper into his little Ouji-world as of late. And the more he does

the more full of himself the Ouji gets. I can't have Goku-san coming back one day from a spar announcing he's broken rule

number ONE! " she kicked the Tummy3000 across the room and into the couch in frustration. Chi-Chi watched the device roll

back and forth for a moment before stopping, " ... "

" Um, Kaasan? " Gohan spoke up.

A wicked grin suddenly played across Chi-Chi's face.

Gohan's concern doubled, " Kaasan? "

" I am a genius. " Chi-Chi announced to herself as she picked the Tummy3000 up, " That Ouji is going to wish he never

even MET Goku-san when I'm through with him! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA**HA!** " lightning crashed behind her. Chi-Chi grinned

fiercely, " Excellent. "

" We'll uh, just be going now. " Videl said as she reached for the doorknob again, " You can umm, hold onto that

until the next time we visit. "

" Wait. "

Videl and Gohan watched her carefully.

" Before you go, I want you to show me how this thing works... "

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" Ahhhhh... " Goku sighed in content relief. He had just finished an intense, 2-hour-long spar with Vegeta and was

now sitting next to the little ouji at the edge of the river; his gi torn all apart, " Sparring with Veggie really calms me

down. " Goku smiled.

" Well I'm glad you had fun. " Vegeta smirked and fell onto his back.

" Aw Veggie, I always have fun with you no matter WHAT we're doing! "

The ouji's cheeks turned red, " Ah..thanks, Kakarrotto. "

Goku watched him with a warm expression on his face, " I think I could spend all day with you. "

" Heh. " Vegeta smirked boastfully, " You flatter me, my sweet peasant. "

" Hm. " Goku happily turned his attention back to the river. It was starting to get cooler out again and the

majority of wildlife had either flown to warmer climates, swam south on the river, or gone into hibernation, " It's so quiet

around here. "

" Or lonely. " Vegeta suggested.

Goku flopped onto his back, " I'm not lonely. " he paused, " Are you? "

" No. "

" ... " ▫

" ... " ▫

Goku reached over with his left hand to hold Vegeta's right only to have the ouji pull his arm away at the last

second and fold both over his chest, his face starting to turn bright red, " Haha! Veggiesosilly! " he reached again only

to freeze in place as a terrible premonition hovered over him. Instead of reaching the now-terrified Goku glomped Vegeta

instead, startling him, " VEGGIE! " he cried out, worried as he held on tightly until the knots in his stomach and the chill

on his skin lifted from his body. Goku felt his sense of calm returning and he slowly let loose his grip on Vegeta.

" Wahhhh? " Vegeta wobbled back and hit the grass, his entire body glowing bright red. He quickly whipped out a

bottle of peasant-repel and sprayed himself, " What was THAT for?! " he gawked, creeped out.

" Veggie won't ever leave me, will he? " the larger saiyajin said pleadingly, panic still vividly visable in his

eyes.

" What are you talking about? " Vegeta got to his feet.

" That bad feeling...the one that I've been getting lately but goes away... " Goku stared up at him.

" Heh, Kakarrotto. You don't need to worry about me. The Great and Powerful Saiyajin no Ouji can easily defeat any

foe who dares cause him and his loved ones harm. "

" What about Buu? "

" Buu was different. " Vegeta said bluntly. He perked up, " So? Where do you want to go now? "

" It doesn't matter where, as long as I'm with Veggie! "

Vegeta's entire face flushed red, " I swear you've been acting mushier than usual today. " he said with slight

suspicion.

" Umm, I am sorry? " Goku replied, confused.

" You know, " the ouji said, changing the subject, " They're having a parade in West City, one of those festival

things with huge inflated balloons, marching bands, themed-floats and such. " he said casually.

" YAY! Let's go! " Goku grinned, bouncing to his feet.

" It wasn't an invitation, I was just trying to make conversation. " Vegeta sweatdropped, embarassed.

" Please Veggie! " the larger saiyajin said excitedly.

" But we'd be crowded between all those people... " the ouji folded his arms and looked away, " I don't like being

stuck in crowds...its too claustrophobic. "

" Then we'll just watch from Veggie's room, or even the roof! Nobody else can climb to the roof. " Goku pointed out.

" Hn... " Vegeta thought it over, then sighed, " Alright. "

" HOORAY! " Goku grabbed the smaller saiyajin's arm, startling him as he prepared to teleport, " I get to see the

parade with Veggie! "

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" Hm.. " Bulma stood there, staring at the frozen turkey on the kitchen counter.

" Hey Bulma whatcha doin? " Vejitto and Gogeta poked their heads into the room.

" If Vegeta doesn't get back soon I'm going to have to cook the turkey. " she said, continuing to stare at it as if

it were one of her experiments.

" Oh-kay! " Gogeta chirped and the two of them started to leave.

" I'm not good at cooking turkeys. Infact the entire kitchen seems to have something against me and Son-kun. Whenever

either of us tries to cook or bake something in here it explodes. "

" Would you like us to help? " Vejitto asked.

" Yeah! We'll cook the turkey! " Gogeta grinned.

" You two can cook? "

" Of course! We both have all of Mommy's knowledge of how to cook/bake delicious treats. " Vejitto smirked and

pointed to his head.

" You'll help me then. "

" Mmm-hmm! " they both nodded in unison.

Bulma smiled, " GREAT! Now let's get to work! "

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" Well, it looks like a normal turkey. " Bulma said as she stared at it in the oven.

" See, it looks like you're a good cook afterall. " Gogeta patted her on the shoulder.

She smiled and the turkey spontaniously combusted in the oven, sending turkey juices flying at the trio.

" ... " they stood there with blank expressions on their faces and half-baked stuffing running down their arms and

faces.

" Knew it was too good to be true. " Bulma sighed, then opened the fridge and perked up, " Luckily I have a spare! "

" ▫Creak▫ " the front door creaked open and Vegeta wobbled inside, looking dazed and flushed red.

" Vegeta! " she beamed, running over to him, " You're just in time--what happened to you? "

" Kakarrotto wanted to see the parade. He also decided he'd lean against me the whole time making mushy sounds of

contentment. " the small saiyajin whipped out his bottle of peasant-repel and sprayed himself with it.

" I didn't see you come in. "

" We were on the roof. " Vegeta sat down on the living room couch.

" The roof? "

" Kakarrotto's idea. " he shifted around, " He's starting to 'worry' about me again. "

" He can't help it. " she walked over and sat down next to him, " He likes having you around so naturally it would

bother him if something were to happen to you. "

" But nothing IS going to happen to me. Besides, even if something did I could easily handle it. " the ouji boasted.

" Uh-huh. " she smirked back at him, " So, do you think you could handle dinner? "

" Huh..that is just strange. " Vejitto remarked as he and Gogeta inspected the oven, " It does not look like anything

could've caused the turkey to randomly blow up like that...unless you put in too much salt. "

" Salt does have a way of doing that. " Gogeta nodded, intregued.

" Or paprika. "

" Where IS Son-kun? " Bulma asked.

Vegeta flopped down on his side, beat, " Onna's apparently discovered his cellphone number and called him back home

due to some "utmost emergancy" of some type. " he let out a yawn.

" You oh-kay, Mommy? " Vejitto peeked over the top of the couch.

" I felt like performing a little more extreme level of sparring today so Kakarrotto and I fought at ssj3, and, as

you know, that form happens to tire me out relatively quickly. " he closed his eyes.

" So who won? "

Vegeta smirked, " Heh... "

" Wow! Congradulations, Vegeta. " Bulma said, impressed, " No wonder you're so tired. How about we order pizza

instead then, that is if you don't feel up to cooking... "

The ouji opened one eye, " Pizza would be delightful. "

" Great. " she got up, " Hey Gogeta, could you toss me the-- " Bulma looked down and froze to see the phone already

in her hand, " --phone.

" :) " Gogeta grinned at her.

" Right. " Bulma shook her head, baffled, " Now how many are we ordering? "

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" Heh-heh-heh...yes...this will be sure to knock that evil little Ouji's seme-ish ambitions down a level. " Chi-Chi

held out Goku's life-sized Veggie-Plushie who's she had attached the Tummy3000 to temporarily to provide an example. She had

placed the settings towards the extreme, causing the plushie to look as if it were in its 3rd trimester. The plushie's blue

tank-top barely fit.

" ▫Ding▫Dong▫ " Goku rang the doorbell, " Chi-chan! Hello? "

" Hi sweetie! Come in. " Chi-Chi said pleasantly as she opened the door, " How was your Ouji-time? "

" Oh it was GREAT Chi-chan! I sparred with Veggie in ssj3 and then we layed around by the river and talked and then

Veggie took me to see the parade in West City and we sat on the roof and pla-tonicallysnuggled and--GASP! PLUSHIE! " Goku

froze in shock at the plush toy leaning against the wall, " You're going to be a MOMMY! "

" ...▫squeak▫ " Plushie slid slightly.

" I'm so HAPPY for you! " Goku glomped the plush toy.

Chi-Chi sweatdropped.

" Hey, wait a minute, Plushie can't have babies, he's doesn't have any baby-making organs! Infact he doesn't have

any organs at all! He's full of soft cotton stuffing! " Goku held Plushie up, baffled.

" And he's a **male** plush toy. " Chi-Chi added in flatly.

" That too. " Goku said while examining Plushie's stomach, " How could this ever have happened? "

" Heh, now that I can explain. " Chi-Chi touched the spot on Plushie's back and the Tummy3000 instantly turned back

to its transparent color and fell off of Plushie's middle onto the ground.

" OH! I get it! Chi-chan is getting back at me for sur-prising her earlier! That was funny, Chi-chan. " Goku laughed.

" No actually. " Chi-Chi said, causing him to stop, " You see Goku-san, I have a plan. "

" A plan? " he watched her uneasily.

" Uh.. " Chi-Chi noticed the expression, " I mean, well its more like a **game**-- "

Goku's face lit up, " I like games, Chi-chan! "

" And so do I. " she put her hands on his shoulders, " How would you like to play a game with me? "

" What kind of game? "

" A Ouji-related game. " Chi-Chi tried to keep the smirk from appearing on her face.

The large saiyajin beamed, " REALLY? A game for Chi-chan and me AND Veggie to play! I can't WAIT to tell Veggie! "

he whipped out his little blue cellphone only to have Chi-Chi snatch it away from him.

" NO! "

" ? " ▫

" Ah--we'll uh, we don't need to tell the Ouji right now because he'll...find out later! Yeah. " she laughed

nervously, _::**Much** later::_ " You see Goku-san, we're going to play a little game called _"'Veggie' has a baby--but not_

_really_. "

Goku cocked an eyebrow at her, confused, " Eh? "

" You see we're going to slip into the Ouji's room tonight and you're going to use those powerful reflexes of yours

to strap this around the ouji's mid-section while he's sleep. After that we'll quietly teleport back home and eagerly await

the morn upon which that evil little creature will awaken to mistakenly find one of his deepest fears has come true! "

" Chi-chan that doesn't sound very nice. " Goku pouted, " Does little Veggie know we'll be doing this to him? "

" Umm, yes? " she smiled cheesily at him.

" Oh! " Goku perked back up, " Well in that case oh-kay! " he picked up the Tummy3000, " If Veggie knows about this

than I'll do it! " Goku turned back to Chi-Chi, " I wouldn't want to accidentally cause my Veggie pain or stress or even

irrational fear. "

" Of course you wouldn't. " Chi-Chi laughed nervously, " Now let's have dinner and then we'll strike! "

" "Strike"? " Goku looked worried again.

" Leave. We'll, LEAVE and head to the Ouji's house. " Chi-Chi 'corrected' herself.

" Oh. Alright Chi-chan. " Goku happily headed into the kitchen.

Chi-Chi breathed a sigh of relief.

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" Yawwwwwn! " Vegeta yawned widely as he turned about on the living-room couch. He slowly opened his eyes.

" Hey there, "sleeping beauty", have a nice nap? "

" Hm? " Vegeta's eyes shot open and he yelped to see Goku nose-to-nose with him, " WAAAAHHH! " the ouji bolted to

his feet and tried to scramble away in panic while the deep red blush covered his cheeks.

" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! " a laugh rang out behind him.

Vegeta stared lamely out into the kitchen, his brain suddenly realizing just who that had been, " Hello to you too. "

he looked over his shoulder at Turles, embarassed.

" So Vegeta-san, I heard you went sparring with Kakarrotto today. " Turles smirked, " Did you have _fun_? "

Vegeta stood up on the couch as if it would make him more impervious to having Turles try to re-arrange his words on

him, " Why yes, Kakarrotto and I had quite a bit of PURELY PLATONIC fun with each other. "

" Platonic...hai. " he snickered, " You know, Vegeta-san, I happened to stumble upon quite the juicy tidbit of

information a couple months ago. " he held up a cd-rom with Goku's name on it. Vegeta stared at him curiously, " That

Brain-Freezer machine, VERY interesting. "

" HEY! You're not supposed to look at those! " Vegeta grabbed the cd out of his hands, " NOBODY is! "

" Hai, but listening to the Warning Label on the cd holder would be considered "good", right Vegeta-san? " the evil

type-3 saiyajin smiled.

" Hn.. " a vein bulged on Vegeta's forehead, " So...how many did you look at? "

" Oh, just that one. Thanks to being slapped with so many "rules", Kakarrotto's mind is full of hidden passageways

leading to secret, powerful non-platonic desires. " Turles said casually, " He'll be quite entertaining to have around once

Chi-Chi passes on and all those rules fly out the window. "

" What's on the cd? " Vegeta asked bluntly.

" I thought you just said we're not supposed to know. " he teased.

" Yes but since you know and I'm your ruler I have a right to share in that information that you neither of us were

supposed to know about in the first place. " Vegeta said astutely.

" You just want a peek into Kakarrotto's mind, huh? Find out what turns him on, perhaps? " Turles grinned wickedly.

" AHH! " Vegeta's face went bright red, " THAT LAST PART IS COMPLETELY UNTRUE! " he snapped, then plopped his

behind back onto the couch, " However I would greatly enjoy learning a little more about how Kakarrotto's brain operates. "

" He's very secretive about it. "

" I know. "

" But that's not Kakarrotto's fault, its Chi-Chi's. "

" Yeah. " Vegeta snorted, upset, " If anyone should be placing rules upon Kakarrotto it should've been me. "

" I should warn you, Vegeta-san. Kakarrotto's uncensored thoughts are rather...passionate in nature. " Turles

taunted him.

" Now that, I also believe is a **lie**. " Vegeta said, " Kakarrotto doesn't think such things, and besides why would he

censor HIMSELF? "

" I dunno, maybe its a "rule". Or maybe he thinks **what** he thinks is too naughty in accordance with the rules and

censors it to keep himself safe from Chi-Chi's wrath. " Turles explained.

" I still don't believe you about this. "

" Then why don't you come down to the lab with me and find out. "

" I think I will. " Vegeta got off the couch and proudly lead Turles down the hall and to the lab door.

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" Well....that was unexpected. " Vegeta and Turles stood there before the Brain-Freezer and the computer it was

attached to; both with a huge lock hanging over them and a "CLOSED" sign infront.

" Apparently someone must've discovered my insidious acts and decided to prevent me from watching further. " Turles

decided, then felt a tap on his shoulder, " Hello? "

" ▫SWIPE▫! " Bulma grabbed the cd from him, " You can't go poking around in other people's private memories!

Especially ones that they had erased! "

" Ah, but Kakarrotto didn't want these memories erased, that's the thing. " Turles pointed out, grinning, " The two

of you forced him to erase them. "

" We would never do such a thing to Son-kun. " Bulma protested, putting the cd-rom with Goku's name on it away.

" You would, given the circumstances. You even erased your own memories of the situation, it was really that jarring

to the two of you that such a timeline exists. "

Mirai walked by the hallway and noticed the lab door open. He peeked inside.

" Mirai, hello. " Turles smirked up at him, " I was just getting to mention you. Remember the first time you used the

timemachine to prevent the androids from destroying the world only to mess up the future in a completely different sense of

the word? " he broke into an all out grin.

" ▫FWOOSH▫! " a lavender blur rushed down the stairs and a hand was instantly slapped over Turles mouth as he was

put into a headlock, " How do you know this. " Mirai demanded nervously.

Turles lifted Mirai's hand off his mouth, " Oh, I, being a type-3 saiyajin, know many things...but this thing I

found out through use of one of Kakarrotto's files from the brain-freezer! " he pointed to it, " You've been keeping some

amazingly entertaining secrets from us, Mirai. "

The demi-saiyajin looked over at Bulma and Vegeta, who were staring at him blankly, " Ah haha..haha... " he started

to sweat, " You, don't really want to know, do you? "

" Is it something that would send my mind reeling into an unbelievable maddening horror of which I would fall to my

knees and scream as a Kaka-related fear pierced the deepest part of my soul? " Vegeta asked.

" Yes. "

" No thank you then. " the ouji said and headed back to the stairs.

" Heh-heh, he's scared. " Turles chuckled.

" I AM NOT! " Vegeta shouted, halfway up the stairs.

" Well if I recall correctly, just 5 minutes ago you were rather eager to discover Kakarrotto's hidden, secret, and

private memories of which he himself no longer has the knowledge. " the larger saiyajin said cooly, " And now that you know

Mirai has known about it for so many years you've decided you're better off NOT knowing? "

" Hai, infact I am. If this information was so important then I doubt I would've forced Kakarrotto and myself to have

it erased to begin with. "

" Oh-kay, if you want to be that way... " he smirked back at Vegeta.

" OH! " Bulma said suddenly, " Vegeta there's pizza on the oven, its still warm but you may have to heat it up a

little. "

" Thanks. " the ouji nodded and left the lab, closing the door behind him.

Turles chuckled, " Hahaha...uke. "

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" Mmm..heeheehee. " Goku stared at himself in the mirror with the Tummy3000 on, " _Veggie_. "

" Goku-san. " Chi-Chi opened the door.

" EEP! " Goku pulled his gi shirt over it, then turned so he had his back to her and unhooked the device,

" Hereyago. " he held it out with his face bright pink.

" Um, thank you. " Chi-Chi took it from him, " What were you doing just now? "

" Nothing. " Goku said loudly.

" Yeah...right. That's what I thought. " she smiled shakily, " Now let's get going, its just past 11:00pm, that's

the Ouji's bedtime, correct? "

" Normally. " the large saiyajin said. He picked the soda up off the counter and took a sip. Chi-Chi had given it to

him so he wouldn't fall asleep in the middle of their "game", seeing as she normally had Goku in bed several hours earlier,

which was why he was usually able to wake up around 5am, " Mmm, this is good. "

" Well don't get TOO attached. " Chi-Chi took it from him. Goku frowned. She reached up and placed her arm on his

shoulder, " Now let's get going. "

Goku put his fingers on his forehead and teleported them out of his bedroom and into Vegeta's.

Chi-Chi immediately pinched her nose from the smell the small saiyajin under the covers was giving off, _::Oh__ gross!_

_His scent must get concentrated at night or something::_

_::I think Veggie smells **nice**!::_ a voice said cheerfully.

Chi-Chi looked over to see Goku waving to her and sweatdropped, " It's probably a saiyajin thing. " she whispered,

" Here. " Chi-Chi handed the Tummy3000 to Goku and tip-toed around to the side of the bed.

" Zzzz..ZZzzz..ZZZzzzz. " Vegeta slept quietly.

" Aww, Veggiesocute. " Goku clasped his hands together, touched.

" He does look less menacing when he's unconsious. " Chi-Chi added, then started to lift the covers off him and

froze halfway to see Vegeta was shirtless, " Oh God...please have pants on, please have pants on. " she murmured to herself

like a mantra, then sighed in relief to see Vegeta did indeed have pants on, or rather boxer shorts, " At least its

something. Goku-sa, can you put it on him at this angle? "

" Not really. " Goku watched Vegeta, who was sleeping on his side, " Hold this! " he cheerfully handed the device to

Chi-Chi and grabbed Vegeta by the arms, then lifted him so he was sitting upright.

" WAHH! " Chi-Chi froze, fearful Vegeta would suddenly wake up, " What are you DOING?! " she whispered loudly.

" Do not worry, Chi-chan, for my little Veggie is a really heavy sleeper. " Goku propped Vegeta's back against his

pillows, " There. You sit tight, Veggie. " he smiled warmly at the sleeping saiyajin, then took the Tummy3000 back from

Chi-Chi and started to put it on the small ouji.

" Oh! Goku-san, could you do me another small favor as well? " she asked politely.

" Oh-kay. " Goku nodded.

" Put some ki into the device. "

Goku stared at her blankly, " But, why? "

" Well, it'll be more..realistic, this way. " Chi-Chi smirked.

The large saiyajin happily shrugged and did so.

" I set it on a timing mode, that means it'll slowly enlarge from its minimum size over a period of time. " Chi-Chi

rubbed her hands together.

" Ahhh.. " Goku said, then paused, " But, why would Veggie want it to do that? "

" ... " ▫

" Chi-chan? "

" Some questions are best left to the experts, Goku-san. " Chi-Chi nodded wisely, " Now hurry up, I'd rather stay in

this Ouji-germed environment for as small an amount of time as possible. " she turned around and nearly fell over,

" GOKU-SAN! "

" What? " Goku stared at her, now laying next to the heavily-sleeping ouji in the bed.

" ... " Chi-Chi folded her arms and stared at him condescendingly.

Goku pouted, " Oh-kay. " he slid out from under the sheets and waddled back over to her.

" You're taking another bath as soon as we get home, got it? " Chi-Chi put her hand on his arm.

" Hai Chi-chan. " Goku nodded and teleported them both out of Vegeta's room and back to Mount Paozu.

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" Uhhhh.. " Vegeta groaned as he opened his eyes. He glanced over at his alarm clock, " ACK?! 10:30am!? " he grabbed

it, " Kuso, I can't believe I slept through the alarm, again. " he turned to the now-open door to his room and deduced

someone else must've heard it and come to shut the alarm off when Vegeta himself was unable to. The ouji sighed, then sniffed

the air and flushed light red, " Kakarrotto? " he flipped up the sheets off the empty side to his bed and yelped at the small

group of kaka-germs squiggling about, " AHH! " Vegeta grabbed the peasant-repel off the counter and sprayed the germs, " How

did THEY get in here. " he shuddered, hopping out of bed only to fall over, " WHOA! " Vegeta let out a shout as he hit the

ground, " ...hm. My equilibrium seems to be off. " the ouji casually glanced down and gasped to see a small lump on his

stomach, " WAHHH WHAT IS THAT!? "

" ... " ▫

Vegeta poked the lump, " Perhaps..I ate something sugar-laden enough to cause me to gain weight in my abdomen. " he

stood up and shuddered at it, " That does look rather disturbing. Well, I should be able to burn the extra pounds off easily

with a few hours in the gravity room. " the ouji boasted, thumping his fist against his chest. He walked over to the closet

and took out one of his larger tank-tops and pants, then put his gloves and boots on and promptly left the room.

The little ouji made his way down the stairs and peeked into the kitchen on his way to the gravity room, " Hey

Vejitto, Goge-- "

Gogeta stood there at the stove and flipped a pancake up into the air which Vejitto, who was standing on the ceiling

with his plate in hand, caught as if gravity had suddenly taken leave of the kitchen.

" o.O " Vegeta stared at them in shock and confusion.

" Hey Toussan! " Gogeta chirped, flipping two more pancakes up to Vejitto. The portara fusion easily caught these

and whipped out a bottle of syrup, which he squirted onto the pancakes. He then took out a fork and started to eat, " Want

some pancakes? "

" Uh...sure. " Vegeta walked into the kitchen and sat down. Vejitto teleported himself back to his seat.

" Since you slept late, Goggie and I de-cided to make our own breakfast. " Vejitto said happily between bites.

" Hai. Right. " the smaller saiyajin said.

" You oh-kay Toussan? You sound a little...disconnected. " Gogeta said, confused.

Vegeta got up and got a plate and fork for himself, " I'm fine. Really. I must've just eaten something that didn't

agree with me. "

" You mean the pizza? " Gogeta tossed several pancakes to him.

" Yeah..the pizza. That must've been it. " the ouji laughed nervously.

" ? " Vejitto watched him, worried.

" Oh-kay! " Gogeta chirped and took some pancakes for himself, then sat down at the table, followed by Vegeta.

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" Errr....ARRRR...GRRROOOO... "

Goku and Goten poked their heads into Chi-Chi's room, " Chi-chan what are you doing? "

" Uh?! " Chi-Chi froze in place. She was leaning towards her mirror with her hands on the counter, " Well, you see

Goku-san, its part of the game. "

" Oh? The one from last night? "

" What game? " Goten looked up at him.

" YES! That game! " she smiled cheerfully, " You see, normally when the Ouji does something that angers me,

everything comes so natural. But this is "pretend" anger since I know the Ouji isn't REALLY p--ah, putting on weight. In

order to keep him from getting suspicous of me. Afterall, if this situation were real I would probably become enraged at him

and accuse the Ouji of perversing your mind into a state of, well, "non-platonicness". " Chi-Chi explained.

" ...Toussan do you know what Kaasan's talking about? " Goten asked him.

" Not really. " Goku sighed, scratching his head, " Chi-chan? "

" Yes? "

" Why would you pretend to be shocked when both you and Veggie know about you having me put that thing on Veggie's

tummy? "

" ... " Chi-Chi was silent for a moment, " Umm, because that too is part of the game! "

" Oh. Alright. " Goku looked even more confused than before.

" Now remember, when we go up to the Ouji's house this afternoon-- "

" --we get to go to VEGGIE'S! " Goku gushed excitedly.

" Veggie-san's fun! " Goten cheered.

" HOORAY! " Goku pumped his fists in the air.

Chi-Chi's bottom left eye twitched, " Now, when we go up to the Ouji's house this afternoon I want you to pretend

that nothing happened last night. The entire scene where we snuck into his room and attached the Tummy3000, DIDN'T HAPPEN. "

" Hmm.. " Goku stared at her, slight suspicion on his face which caused Chi-Chi to pale in worry, " And, little

Veggie's oh-kay with this. "

" Uh, yes. Yes he is. "

" ...and this isn't lying? Because I NEVER lie to my Veggie, Chi-chan. "

" No, its not "lying". she laughed nervously and patted him on the shoulders, " Now let's get ready to go. I still

have a little bit of practicing left to do; you'd be surprised how hard it is to pretend you're angry. " Chi-Chi motioned

Goku and Goten out of the room.

" But Chi-chan-- "

" --see you in half hour! " she cheerfully closed the door on them, " ▫Whew▫. "

Goku frowned, then glanced over as if the little ouji was standing there, " Veggie... "

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" YAHHHHHHH! " Vegeta thrust his leg out under 550x earth's gravity, " HA HA HA HA HA! " he pulled his leg down and

began a flurry of punches at his non-existant opponent, who looked a lot like Goku for someone who didn't exist. The ouji

flipped up into the air and spun as he hit the ground, " HIAH! " He swung his left fist around to the side while sending his

right elbow backwards. Vegeta then kicked his right foot up and flipped backwards before landing on his toes and launching

ki-blasts from both hands at either end of the wall, " ▫Whew▫. " he stood back upright and casually walked to the machine.

Vegeta grinned proudly at the results the machine displayed in bright red digital numbers on a black background, " Heh,

that's quite an improvement over yesterday. " the ouji contently shut the machine down and lightly lifted his tank-top up.

He looked down and let out a small yelp followed by quickly pulling the shirt back down, " It..looks even bigger than before.

How can this be? " Vegeta said outloud to himself. He pulled it back up again, then down, then up. Still there, " ...my God.

There's something seriously wrong with me. " the ouji murmured in disbelief.

_::Maybe an allergy?::_ Nango suggested, the tail moving infront of Vegeta and tapping his stomach.

" Hai, but I haven't eaten anything out of the ordinary lately. " Vegeta folded his arms, trying to figure out what

exactly was causing this strange and sudden metamorphosis, " It's not fatty food because it would've burned off in that

rigorous 4-hour training session just now. It's not an allergy because everything I've eaten in the last 24 hours has been

foods that I eat on a regular basis. " he poked his stomach and froze. The ouji placed his entire hand onto the center of it

and felt something warm inside, " !? " Vegeta grabbed it with both his hands and felt a small ki. His arms instantly went

limp and felt to his sides while a small doom cloud hung overhead.

_::Vegeta?::_ his tail asked uneasily, _::What is it?::_

" Nothing. I'm fine. Hahaha...of course I am. The mere idea is simply preposterous. I--I mean there's no WAY, right?

I, no I, that would mean at some point in the recent past I and one of my---but I'm not even BUILT to--I, I mean where would

it **go**, there's no place **for** it to go and-- "

_::For WHAT to go!?::_

" ▫DING▫DONG▫ " the doorbell rang, shattering the small saiyajin's increasingly terrifying thought current.

Vegeta opened the gravity room door and peeked outside.

" Hey Vegeta could you get that? " Bulma called from down in the lab as she held out a beaker full of a dangerous

acid which she was gently moving towards its container.

" Uh, sure. " he said in a faraway voice as he walked up to the front door. Vegeta looked down to see his shirt was

still halfway up and promptly pulled it down. The ouji took a deep breath and opened the door.

" VEGGIE! " Goku reached forward and glomped the little ouji, " **HI** Veggie how ARE you today! "

" HiVeggiesanhowyadoinImgonnagofindTrunksnowbye! " Goten said excitedly as he bounded inside and up the stairs

towards Trunks's room.

" Ouji. " Chi-Chi said. Vegeta cocked his head over his shoulder while Goku continued to hug him. He cocked an

eyebrow at Chi-Chi's almost-grinning smirk. Chi-Chi noticed his odd reply and instantly put on a fairly convincing scowl.

" Hmm.. " the ouji looked as if he were calculating something logically in his head.

" STOP THAT I DID NOTHING TO YOU! " Chi-Chi snapped.

" MMMMmm.. " the larger saiyajin held Vegeta tighter, his mind starting to wander making him oblivious to the goings

on around him.

" Strange how you haven't snapped at Kakarrotto to let go of me yet. "

" Maybe I'm hoping some unsuspecting germs of his will sneak into your brain through your ears while I distract you

with my purposely obvious unusual reaction to you being hugged by Goku-san. " Chi-Chi said thoughtfully.

" Aw lil Veggie... "

The ouji's cheeks started to flush red as he noticed both his legs had gone numb from the kaka-germs. He whipped out

the peasant-repel and sprayed them, causing dozens of little kaka-germs to fall to the floor. The pins and needles came and

his legs started to regain their feeling. Vegeta smirked at this small victory, " You can let go now, Kakarrotto. "

" Hm? " Goku glanced down at him, then flushed pink in the face once he realized how long he'd been holding the

smaller saiyajin and that Chi-Chi was right beside, " YES CHI-CHAN! " he said loudly and dropped Vegeta to the floor where

the kaka-germs scattered.

" Geez Kakarrotto where's your mind today? " Vegeta got up, concerned while he rubbed his rear end in mild pain.

Goku quickly grabbed Vegeta's hands and bent down to his height, " Veggie I would NEVER lie to you you know that! "

he pleaded. This time Vegeta's entire face turned bright red.

" Huh? "

Chi-Chi slapped herself on the forehead, " So much for being discreet. " she muttered.

" OI! Vegeta-san, Kakarrotto, Chi-Chi! How wonderful that I've caught you all in the same room at the same time. "

Turles said pleasantly as he walked into the room only to be randomly yanked by the back of his collar into the dark hallway.

The trio sweatdropped at the sudden interuption, then continued their conversation.

" What are you doing! " Mirai whispered loudly, slamming Turles's back against the wall with his hand over his mouth.

Turles removed the hand and smirked, " Oh nothing. Just catching up on the news and weather, relaying a little

insider information, that sort of thing. "

" Just because I made a mistake on my first time-traveling...excursion, doesn't mean you have to blab the entire

incident to everybody! " Mirai exclaimed.

" Oh, its not the fact that that particular timeline alteration was caused by YOU that matters to me, its the

aftermath which followed is what I find so deliciously interesting. " Turles rubbed his hands together menacingly.

" Yeah well I wouldn't have been keeping it a secret for the past decade or so if I didn't have a reason to! " Mirai

demanded.

" That's part of what makes it so JUICY. " Turles grinned.

" ... " Mirai stared at him lamely.

" Yesssss? "

" **KAASAN** "

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" Is this really necessary? " Turles said as he sat strapped in to the brain-freezer.

" I happen to think so. " Bulma said as she input information into the computer while Mirai adjusted the device

placed on Turles's head, " Afterall if Mirai says Son-kun and Vegeta shouldn't know about what you're trying to tell them I

can't risk you sending either or even both of them into states of severe mental trauma. "

" Aw come on! Half the audiance doesn't even know what fic I'm talking about. " Turles motioned.

" Well they're not going to find out. " Bulma said as she turned to the main switch, only to glance back at him,

" And leave the fourth wall alone! "

" Hey. " Turles evilly waved anyway.

Bulma threw the switch and a bright light engulfed the entire lab along with a buzzing sound. It calmed 5 seconds

later, " There, now that's better isn't it. " she smiled as she turned back to Turles only to find his chair empty, " HUH!? "

" BWA HAHAHAHAHA! " an evil laugh echoed from above them.

Bulma and Mirai sweatdropped.

The demi-saiyajin sighed, " This is gonna take a while. "

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" ▫Ding▫dong▫. "

" Yes? " Bulma opened the front door to reveal Raditsu standing there, " Ah! Raditsu I'm so glad you made it! "

" Anytime. " Raditsu said happily, " So, what did you call me over for? "

" I need you to restrain Turles for me. "

" ... " Raditsu's face went blank, then pale green, " Bye Bulma. " he backed up and closed the door behind him.

" HEY! " she flung the door open and ran out after him, " Raditsu wait! "

" I can't do that Bulma. I don't like him, and frankly, he scares me. " Raditsu put it bluntly.

" Aww, I didn't know you cared. "

He froze and glanced down to see Turles glomping his arm and grinning up at him, " WAHH! " Raditsu screamed and swung

his arm sideways, sending Turles slamming into the side of the house. Raditsu nervously rubbed his arm as if it were

diseased, " Ehhhh... "

" Hahahahaha! " Turles laughed, now smashed against the wall upside-down. He did a back-flip and landed on the grass,

" How are you today, my large lackey? "

" I'm sorry Bulma, I'm going home. " Raditsu reached his fingers up towards his forehead.

" Aw come on Raditsu! You can't go! Turles likes you! He'll listen to you! "

" Oh-kay, that 3rd statement you made, that doesn't necessarily condone the 4th one as an unopposable outcome. "

" What?! "

" Just because he likes me doesn't mean he'll listen to me. It's like talking to Vegeta back before Vegeta met

Kakarrotto---if Vegeta was a type-3 saiyajin, which he's not. " Raditsu explained, " I mean, he's like Vegeta used to be,

only **different**. "

" I'll give you a shiny medal of honor if you join up with me, Raditsu! " Turles teased while holding said large

shiny medal up in the air and waving it to and fro.

" ... " Raditsu and Bulma sweatdropped at the sight. He turned back to face her, " VERY different. "

" It won't take long, I promise. I just need you to get him down to the lab so I can strap him into the brain-freezer

and erase a little piece of information he extracted from one of Son-kun's discs so he won't remember knowing stuff about the

8th timeline that Vegeta, Son-kun, you, the fusions, and I had purposely erased from our own memories and tell Vegeta and

Son-kun so they both go into hysterics. "

" Hm. You know in that case it sounds almost worth it. " Raditsu folded his arms and nodded, " If it'll help keep

Vegeta and ototochan from losing parts of their minds, then I'm in. "

" Great! " Bulma clasped her hands together.

" ...wait, you used that thing on ME?! "

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" Mmmmm... " Goku sighed happily while his shoulders were being rubbed by the smaller saiyajin beside him on the

living room couch, " Haha— "

" Ya like that, huh Kakay? " the ouji teased while Chi-Chi sat in the chair to the right of them, twitching, " So

Onna! " Vegeta glanced back at her, " To what do I owe you and Kakarrotto's little visit to? "

" Oh, we just happened to be in the neighborhood. " Chi-Chi said nonchalantly.

" How peculiar, seeing as you live nearly 4 hours away from here. " he smirked.

" Veggie's a good massager, Chi-chan. " Goku nodded, content.

" Why thank you, Kakarrotto. Its good to know I can deliver such heavy amounts of pleasure onto my subjects. "

" You're doing this to make me upset so I'll blurt out the reason why I came here, aren't you. " Chi-Chi accused him,

averting her eyes from the scene.

" Oh look! Kakay's laying down. "

" HUH!? " Chi-Chi whipped her head towards them and sweatdropped to see Goku still sitting up.

" Hahaha! Ah Onna you know me pretty well. " Vegeta laughed while continuing to rub Goku's back.

" It's not an easy feat. "

" Yeah, I know. "

" MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmm——— " a huge overly-content rumble came from the large saiyajin and both Vegeta and

Chi-Chi's faces turned red.

" Uhhhh... "

" Goku-SAN! " Chi-Chi exclaimed, quickly grabbing Goku by the arm and yanking him up off the couch, " You should know

better than that! "

" I like Veggie, Chi-chan! " he chirped.

" Uh-huh. " she said flatly, " So everything's been pretty 'normal' with you today, huh Ouji? "

" Indeed it has. " Vegeta nodded thoughtfully, his back to them while he tried to reduce the bright red flush in his

face. "

" Nothing out of the ordinary? "

" Nope. "

" Nothing unusual. "

" Nuh-uh. "

" You're sure? "

" Positive. "

" Really. "

" Truely. "

" Hm.. " Chi-Chi pondered.

" You didn't slip me some poison in a recent meal and are currently waiting for 'results', are you Onna? " Vegeta

made a guess, snickered.

" Ha! I dislike you Ouji but I wouldn't attempt MURDER. " Chi-Chi folded her arms.

" Yeah, you'd miss me too much anyway. " he grinned cheesily at her.

" I WOULD NOT! " she snapped angrily.

" **I** miss Veggie everytime I have to go home. " Goku picked Vegeta up from behind and gave him a hug.

" Eep!? " the ouji's face went bright red and he felt Goku's hand moving towards his stomach, _::AHH! I can't let_

_Kakarrotto see that! He'll think something's severely wrong with me!::_ Vegeta panicked and quickly put his hands over his

stomach, blocking Goku's off. The larger saiyajin looked down at him curiously, " Ah, haha. "

" Veggie? " Goku said, worried.

" I'm fine! Really! " Vegeta laughed nervously.

" Really. " Chi-Chi smirked to herself, out of the saiyajins' range of vision.

" Are you sure Veggie? " Goku tilted his head.

" Hai. " he nodded, " ...you can uh, put me down now, Kakarrotto. " the ouji's cheeks started to turn red again.

" Awww..alright. " Goku pouted and plopped Vegeta back onto the floor. Vegeta again adjusted his shirt.

" Hey uh, Kakarrotto? " he asked uneasily.

" Yes Veggie? "

" Have you ever found yourself, "allergic" to any local earth-foods? "

Chi-Chi covered her mouth with her hands to surpress her ever-widening smirk.

" No Veggie, not that I know of. " the larger saiyajin shook his head curiously, " Why? "

" Oh no reason. It's nothing really. " Vegeta waved it off, " I was just curious. "

" Is, Veggie allergic to anything? " Goku asked.

The ouji folded his arms, deep in thought, " Not that I know of. However-- " he was about to lift up his shirt when

he froze, _::Kuso..I can't tell Kakarrotto about it! Not YET, anyway. I don't need to get him worried over something as_

_trivial__ as an allergy...perhaps I should ask Raditsu about saiyajin allergies later::_

" However..what Veggie? " Goku peered down towards him.

" Ah, nothing. " he patted the larger saiyajin on the shoulder.

_::But Vegeta, what about that ki?::_ his tail persisted, anxious and uneasy.

_::There is no ki::_

_::You're not going to go into denial about this until its too late, are you?::_ Nango asked, concerned.

_::Of course not! I'm just saying that..well..wouldn't I REMEMBER such an important non-platonic event if that is_

_indeed__ what happened which I seriously hope is untrue::_ the ouji nervously rambled off to him, _::Wouldn't at least YOU have_

_remembered__ it?::_

Nango paused. He glanced over at Bibishii. She blushed and waved to him. Nango mentally grinned, _::Yeah__, I'm pretty_

_sure__ I'd remember THAT...::_

" Exactly. " Vegeta nodded, proud of himself, _::And__ because of that, a non-platonic incident between me and one of_

_my__ peasants couldn't have possibly occured; leaving the only possible option open--an allergic reaction::_

_::But...the KI?::_ his tail tapped on his stomach, which was radiating with a small warm ki.

_::Part of the reaction. I'm sure that within the next 48 hours my saiyajin metabolism will have found some way to_

_flush__ the allergins out of my body::_ " Hmm! " he nodded confidently.

Goku tilted his head in confusion at the little ouji, " ? "

" Heh, no need to worry about ME, Kakarrotto! " Vegeta grinned, then cracked his knuckles, " Now, let's go have a

sandwich or two, shall we? " he said as he headed off to the kitchen.

" YAY! Veggie-snacks! " Goku cheered and ran after him.

Chi-Chi watched them head out of the room. Vegeta had one hand over his stomach as he walked and smirked, " Any day

now. " she rubbed her hands together cunningly, " MWAHAHAHA! "

Vegeta poked his head back in the living room, " You say something? "

" No. " Chi-Chi froze, still in the evil-laughter position.

" Hai.. " he said suspiciously, then smirked as if he somehow knew what she was plotting, which ironically he didn't,

and ducked back inside.

Chi-Chi let out a sigh of relief as she let her arms hang back at her sides.

" So Kakarrotto! What would you like on your sandwich? "

* * *

2:56 PM 11/30/2004  
END OF PART ONE!  
**Vegeta:** (sweatdrops) I'm still filled with dread about this.  
**Chuquita:** Aw, don't worry Veggie. Just remember, its a fake, non-real belly.  
**Vegeta:** Uh-huh.  
**Goku:** (smiles at where the chapter ended) Heehee, there's LOTS of things I'd like on a sandwich, Veggie! (clasps his hands together)  
**Vegeta:** I'm sure there is. (to Chu) This situation IS "pg", right?  
**Chuquita:** (sweatdrops) Hai Veggie, its only PG.  
**Vegeta:** (smirks) Good, in that case I feel slightly safer.  
**Chuquita:** See you next week everyone!  
**Goku:** BYE! 


	2. I'm having a WHAT?

**Author's Note: Hi everybody! Welcome to Part 2!****  
WARNING: This chapter is rated PG for tummy-related predicaments and the actions of sock-puppets. If anything in the chapter bothers you please click the back button on your browser. Thanks!  
-Chuquita**

8:27 PM 12/1/2004  
E-mail:  
By: Chuquita  
Quote of the Week: _-from dbz Movie 10 "A Dangerous Pair. A Super Warrior Never Rests!!"  
__Gokuh: Gohan, you've grown into a splendid young man.  
__Gokuh: How's life with Chi-Chi and Goten?  
__Gokuh: Goten's becoming more and more like me.  
__Gokuh: Goten! Trunks! You're dads worked hard to collect the Dragon Balls too! Don't give up!  
__Gokuh: Gohan! Help those two!!_

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**Chuey's Corner:  
**Vegeta: ..."splendid"?!  
Goku: :)  
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) Where do you LEARN these words?  
Goku: (happily) From my Veggie!  
Vegeta: (speechless and with his cheeks flushed red) Oh.  
Chuquita: Welcome to Part Two of Fic #97 which is only 3 away from #100, everybody!  
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) You're really geared up for that 100th one, aren't you?  
Chuquita: (grins) Very much so, Veggie! But for now we concentrate on the current fic at hand!  
Goku: (nods)  
Vegeta: (glances up at Q.O.T.W) How would you know if Goten was "becoming more and more like" you? You were DEAD in this movie!?  
Chuquita: (guess) (raises her hand) All-knowing Kaka-powers?  
Goku: (smiles warmly at Veggie)  
Vegeta: Uh...hai. (shifts uneasily) (pauses) You know, you didn't mention me.  
Chuquita: You weren't in Movie 10.  
Goku: Which is VERY lucky indeed cuz the Big Meanie was in that movie and since I was dead I wouldn't have been able to stop him from trying to hurt and steal my Veggie away FOREVER.  
Chuquita: Yeah, since you weren't there Trunks was sorta plopped in your place, Veggie.  
Vegeta: I don't get what you mean.  
Chuquita: Like you in Movie 8; the character you tries to fight Brolli head-on, then gets overwhelmed by his densetsu power and freaks out.  
Vegeta: (embarassed) Thanks for the reminder.  
Chuquita: Movie 10 is actually the next one due to be released. (nods) It's not bad, but it could've used some Veggie.  
Vegeta: You say that about every dbz movie I don't have a part in...and gt.  
Chuquita: (grins) Gt did good with you at the end once the writers remembered how much fun you are to write into the  
script!  
Goku: (glomps Veggie) YEAH! Veggie's the most fun of all!  
Chuquita: (in thought) You know the anime's 20th Anniversary is in two years...I wonder if they'll make a new series...or a  
movie?  
Goku: (excited) YEAH! A VEGGIE movie! With me and our fusion-babies and niichan and Turles! But not the big meanie cuz I dislike him greatly.  
Chuquita: I hear there's still vague rumors about that "live-action-movie" floating around. I'd prefer cgi though. (clasps her hand together) Can you imagine? A super-high-budgeted cgi Goku 'n Veggie walking around a 3-D backdrop of Mount Paouzu!  
Vegeta: We do have 3-D; Budoukai, remember?  
Chuquita: Yeah, but that's ps2 3-D, I'm talking about Summer-Movie-Blockbuster 3-D. And it would have an entertaining and bizarre storyline! Like that time-traveling Chibi Goku one that was dropped from Budoukai 3.  
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) You're just dying for new episodes/movies/specials, aren't you?  
Chuquita: (tired grin) Very badly. (sighs) I really hope they eventually make some new special/eps...I'm going to ask for a  
flash program for Christmas though so maybe I'll be able to make **something**.  
Goku: Yeah!  
Chuquita: And now on with Part 2!

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Summary: Chi-Chi's decided to teach Veggie a lesson on trying to steal Goku once and for all using Videl's ImitationTummy3000 But will Goku be able to stand by while she goes through with it? And will Veggie be able to hide the strange goings on with his belly and simply hope its nothing more than a stomach-ache or will he be forced to deal with one of his biggest kaka-related fears of all? And what will he do when he finds out the added tummy-weight is a fake?

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**Part Two Chapter Titles: Delicious Snacks l Raditsu's Shock l Goku's Nightmare l Veggie's 'tummy' has a Growth Spurt l Lil Pink Dress l I can't take it anymore! Veggie's Tummy Revealed l Fusion-Baby Number 3? Jitto n Goggie's Wishful Thinking l Turles's Mini-Play l Babies l Nerve-Shot Veggie's and Chi-Chi's Predicament l Comfortable l**

* * *

" Mmm! Such delicious sandwiches! " Goku said happily as he chewed at the table while Chi-Chi sat beside him and 

Vegeta across from Goku. Goku's sandwich was stuffed with nearly every sandwich ingredient available in the kitchen.

" I'm pleased that you like them, Kakarrotto. " the little ouji smirked.

Chi-Chi folded her arms in a huff.

" Aw, have I disappointed you in some way, Onna? " he smirked.

" Veggie never disappoints me! " the larger saiyajin chirped and took another bite of his snack.

" Haha--▫oop▫! " Vegeta felt something hit the underside of the table. He peeked beneath the table-cloth and froze to

see his stomach had grown even larger and was now poking out of the bottom of his shirt, " Uhhhhh... " his bottom left eyelid

twitched.

" Come on Goku-san. Let's go home. " Chi-Chi sighed and got up.

" WHAT?! " Goku yelped, " But Chi-chan we just got here and Veggie made such tasty snacks and-- " he paused to see

Vegeta still halfway under the table, his tail nervously flitting back and forth behind him. Goku peered across the table,

" Little Veggie? "

" Huh!? " Vegeta jolted to attention only to hit his head on the underside of the table, " ▫THUMP▫! Kuso... " he

groaned in pain.

" Hahaha. " Chi-Chi chuckled. Goku glanced at her, horrified. She froze, " I mean--oh no, how painful for you. "

Goku bent down, " Veggie oh-kay under there? " he reached for the tablecloth only to have Vegeta grab his wrist.

" YES! I'm, I'm fine. I just need some rest because I'm a little woozy. " the ouji lied, then teleported out from

under the table.

The larger saiyajin frowned, concerned, " Oh Veggie... "

" You know on second thought, let's hang around for a while. " Chi-Chi smiled, _::This__ could get interesting::_

" Really? " Goku's eyes lit up.

" Yup. "

" YAY! " he teleported himself infront of Vegeta's bedroom door and plopped himself infront of it like a guard, a

content little smile on the large saiyajin's face, " I'm gonna protect my Veggie! "

" You do that. " Chi-Chi said, then walked over to the living room tv and turned it on.

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" Hn..there's got to be something in here! " Vegeta nervously went through his clothing drawers and pulled out a

large, dark blue sweater, " Ah, this is big enough to cover it, easily. " he put it on over his current shirt, " There. "

His tail tilted at the sight of the sweater.

" Well, at least I know I'm not pregnant--aside from the fact that I'm not built to become impregnanted--saiyajin

pregnancies usually last from about 8 to 9 months. The fact that this, THING has grown to such a size within a single day

completely destorys that theory. "

_::You keep repeating that as if trying to convince yourself of something::_ Nango sweatdropped.

Vegeta patted his stomach, " Yes, well... "

" Veggie? " Goku knocked on the door, " Are you oh-kay in there? "

The ouji stuck his head out the doorway, " ... " he stared at Goku uneasily.

" If, if Veggie has a problem...I can help you. " the larger saiyajin offered.

" I have no problem Kakarrotto I'm perfectly fine. " he folded his arms.

" Its your tummy, isn't it? "

" O.O " Vegeta's eyes widened 5 times over. He quickly ducked back inside and slammed the door shut behind him,

" He KNOWS?! HOW DOES HE KNOW?! "

" Know what? " Goku asked from behind the door, confused.

" Nothing Kakarrotto! It's NOTHING, I'm sure. " the ouji laughed nervously, the worst-case scenario once again

running through his head. He started to shudder in small vibrations against the door.

" Veggie..? " Goku tilted his head.

" Hey Kakarrotto? "

Goku turned around to see Raditsu standing there wearing a scouter and holding what looked like a fishing net.

" Have you seen Turles? Bulma asked me to catch him for her since he's carrying some "classified information" in his

head. " he pointed to his own, feeling much safer somehow with the scouter on. He adjusted his dark maroon gi pants and

leaned the fishing net against the wall.

" Not really. He came in once earlier but Mirai pulled him into the hallway and I haven't see him since. " Goku

explained.

" Oh. " Raditsu sighed, disappointed.

" Raditsu! " Vegeta whispered from the other side of the door.

" Huh-- " he leaned towards the door only to be yanked inside, " YIPE!? " the door slammed behind him. Goku stared

at it curiously, then picked up Raditsu's fishing net and swung it around by the handle a couple times in amusement.

Raditsu shook his head, dizzy for a moment, " Geez, Vegeta what was that for! " he exclaimed.

The ouji stood there with his back to him, " Raditsu, I'm going to show you this because I believe I can trust you

with this information and that you may know what's causing it. "

" Um, oh-kay. " he scratched his head.

Vegeta turned around and pulled his sweater and shirt up to reveal a rather developed stomach.

" WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! " Raditsu let out a cry of shock as he backed up into the door, " YOU'RE PREGNANT? "

" WHAT?! " Vegeta's expression mirrored the one Raditsu had just made.

" I mean...ah.. " the larger saiyajin tried to tear his eyes off Vegeta's abdomen, " Are you, pregnant? "

The ouji sweatdropped, " That's what I was about to ask. "

" Well, uh... " Raditsu walked up to him.

" It's--it's possible this is only an allergic reaction to an earth-food I ate, right? " Vegeta shifted around.

Raditsu put his hand nervously on Vegeta's stomach. It felt warm with a small ki inside, " ... "

" Allergic...reaction, hai? " the ouji almost pleaded for it to be true.

The larger saiyajin got back up, " Vegeta how long has your stomach, ah, looked like that? "

" Since I woke up this morning. "

" THIS MORNING?! " he gawked, " Something very strange must've happened to you if it's gotten that big over only a

few HOURS. "

" You think I really HAVE been impregnanted, don't you! " Vegeta gawked in horror.

" NO! No, of course I don't Vegeta. " Raditsu tried to calm him down, " Now, think back. Did anything out of the

ordinary happen to you this morning? "

" Hmm. I slept in late. " he sat down on the bed, " And the room smelled vaguely like Kakarrotto so I searched for

the source only to discover a small group of kaka-germs on my bed, which I promptly sprayed with Peasant-Repel and then

went about my day. " Vegeta explained thoughtfully.

" ... " Raditsu stared at him blankly.

" What. " the ouji cocked an eyebrow.

Raditsu opened the door slightly and peeked out at Goku, who had gotten bored with the fishing net and was now simply

sitting there in the hallway against the wall humming something. He pulled his head and the door back in, " NO. " Raditsu

shook his head in discern, " Ototochan wouldn't... " he glanced back to see Vegeta sort of rubbing his stomach while staring

at it, " Vegeta? "

" HUH!? " he instantly put his hands back onto the bed, flushed with embarrassment.

" You know...I have heard of these things called stomach bombs before. Things that you stick into someone's food;

no bigger than a pea; and 48 hours later it explodes, busting your stomach from the inside out. " he pointed up to a

thought-bubble of Vegeta with his stomach getting bigger and bigger until the word "Ka-BOOM" flashed in his place.

The little ouji paled at the bubble and promptly popped it, " You're JOKING?! "

" No, they make them in the East Galaxy, though none of us have any access to such technology. Turles is the only one

who's been to space recently and I somehow doubt he'd want to seriously injure you..physically anyway. "

" That's a mild relief. " Vegeta said dryly.

" I can tell you this much, its not an allergic reaction if it has that ki inside it. " Raditsu sighed, " Maybe you

should get an x-ray of it. "

" NO WAY! "

" Raditsu getting an x-ray would mean Bulma would have to see me in this condition, I can't let her know about this!"

he clutched his stomach.

" Why not? "

" BECAUSE! She would automatically assume my enlarged stomach meant I was pregnant which meant that at some recent

point in my life I engaged in non-platonic acts with one of my peasants! " Vegeta pointed to the stomach again.

" Well don't look at me! " he sweatdropped, " I don't like you that way. "

" I know that. " the ouji twitched, " I was talking about...you know, that person who's related to you and also only

likes me in a purely platonic manner and who is currently outside this door. " he stumbled.

" Kakarrotto. " Raditsu said flatly.

" Hai...Kakarrotto. "

" Yes? "

Vegeta bolted to attention and whipped around to see Goku standing there. He quickly checked to make sure his stomach

was properly covered, relieved that it was, " Kakarrotto. "

" Veggie? "

The little ouji looked away, " Kakarrotto, we've never engaged in non-platonic acts with each other, correct. " his

face was already flushing red while he avoided looking directly at Goku.

" GASP! " Goku gasped, his face turning bright pink, " NEVER Veggie! I would NEVER do such a thing its against Rule

Number 2 which is right below Rule Number 1--the **biggest rule of all**. " his eyes temporarily widened at the end, " ...why

do you ask? "

" Ah, no reason! SAY! How about you go help Raditsu here catch Turles for Bulma. " Vegeta quickly changed the subject

and started to push the brothers towards his door.

" But, but Veggie--? "

" You sure you're gonna be oh-kay, Vegeta. "

" Hai. " he nodded confidently, " After all, there is NOTHING the Great and Powerful Saiyajin no Ouji cannot

conquer! "

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_" Hahaha! " Goku laughed. He was at Bulma's along with the entire gang for Christmas. The large saiyajin was_

_currently__ eating a cookie from the fresh, delicious batch Vegeta had made. Speaking of the little ouji, " ? " Goku looked_

_around__ the room. Everyone was happily chatting and some of the children were opening presents._

_" Kakarrotto! " a voice exclaimed warmly._

_The large saiyajin's ears perked up and a smile covered his face. He turned to see Vegeta standing in the doorway of_

_the__ kitchen, " VEGGIE! " he beamed and held out his arms while the smaller saiyajin came running towards him, arms open and_

_uncharacteristically__ wanting a hug. Once Vegeta was almost a foot before him he started to fade out and disappeared_

_altogether__ just before touching Goku; only a small wind brushed past him instead. He froze in shock, " Veggie? " Goku looked_

_around__, nervous. He tapped Chi-Chi on the shoulder, " Chi-chan where'd Veggie go? "_

_" Who? " she cocked an eyebrow at him._

_" Chi-chan that's not funny! " Goku pouted, feeling insulted for the ouji._

_" ? " Chi-Chi stared at him, baffled._

_Goku walked up to Bulma, who was talking excitedly to Kuririn, Yamcha, and Launch, " Bulma, Veggie disappeared._

_Where'd he go? "_

_" "Veggie"? " she said as if she'd never heard the word before._

_" YES! Veggie! Where is he! " Goku was starting to get worried now._

_" I don't know who you're talking about, Son-kun. " Bulma said truthfully, shaking her head._

_" A new friend of yours, Goku? " Kuririn suggested._

_" NO! Veggie's BEEN my friend! Veggie IS my friend! For the past 13 YEARS Veggie has been and is my friend! " he_

_then__ dashed over to the table, " LOOK! This plate of yummy, warm, soft, gooey chocolate-chip cookies was made by VEGGIE! "_

_Goku reached for the plate only to discover it gone, " Huh? "_

_" Goku are you feeling alright? " Launch asked, worried._

_Goku rushed into the kitchen and opened the drawers where the kitchen supplies were. Bunni's supplies were still_

_there__ but all of Vegeta's were gone, even his "The Great and Powerful Cook" apron was gone. The large saiyajin began to pant_

_nervously__ as a cold sweat dripped down his face, " OH! I know the gravity room! " he ran down the hall and screeched to a_

_halt__. There was no gravity room, not even a door. Goku felt his body begin to tremble and he ran back in the other direction_

_and__ up to the ouji's room, " VEGGIE! **VEGGIE!** " he flung open the door and nearly collapsed in the doorway._

_Empty._

_Vegeta's entire room was completely empty._

_No bed, furniture, not even the still fairly-new closet door that led to Vegeta's now defunked Goku-watching lab._

_" ... " Goku stood there for what felt like a long time. A dry lump slid down his throat, " Veggie. " he said in a_

_little__ voice as he walked towards the center of the room. The floorboards creaked beneath him, giving the room a hollowed-out_

_feel__ to it. The soft plush red carpet that had once adorned the smaller saiyajin's bedroom gone as well, " Little Veggie_

_where__ are you? "_

_" VEGGIE! VEGGIE WHERE ARE YOU PLEASE TALK BACK OR MAKE A NOISE IF YOU CAN HEAR ME! " Goku cried out at the top of_

_his__ lungs._

" ... " ▫

_Nothing but silence._

_Goku glanced up at the ceiling and gasped to see something pinned to it. He flew upwards and took the item off the_

_ceiling__. It was a note. A note that glew bright neon green like radioactive waste. Goku squinted his eyes to try and see the_

_black__ ink the message was written in over the glow. His shoulders slumped when he saw it was written in saiyago._

_" ▫SQWUAK_▫

_Goku whipped his attention to Vegeta's now-curtainless windows just in time to see a flock of birds fly by. He_

_sighed__ in disappointment and turned back to the note in his hands and gasped. The note was disappearing as he held it, " Ve.._

_Ve....Vegg... ":::_

" ...VEGGIE!!! " Goku shot to attention, knocking a small lump off his bed from the jolt, " **I**** GOTTA SAVE MY VEGGIE!** "

" Wahh—— " Goten sat up on the floor, then wobbled to his feet, " Whoa! " he grabbed onto the side of the bed, dizzy.

Goku hopped out of bed, then put his fingers on his forehead as he was falling towards the floor and teleported out

of the house.

Goten rubbed the side of his head and looked upward, " Toussan...? "

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" Ohhh, this is just RIDICULOUS! " Vegeta wailed and half-threatened to slam his head forward onto the sink before

him.

Vegeta's stomach-lump had grown again overnight, and now that it was larger he was able to determine it wasn't his

stomach at all that was expanding but the area that was slightly below it--the same area where Bulma expanded when she was

pregnant with Trunks.

The ouji lamely reached for his toothbrush, then sweatdropped when he found he couldn't reach it with his 'stomach'

in the way so he walked around to the side of the sink to grab it. Vegeta squirted some toothpaste onto the brush and ran it

under cold water, " Well, its offical. Somebody up there hates me. Or somebody down there is enjoying their twisted yet

foolhearted revenge. " he momentarily glanced downward. Vegeta brushed his teeth, then spat in the sink and took a glass of

water, " If I were plotting revenge upon myself this wouldn't exactly be the brand of revenge on mind. " he motioned to his

pregnant-looking tummy, " However I gotta admit it's a fairly creative yet slightly sick way to go. "

Nango sweatdropped, _::You__ can't really just admit that you might **actually** be pre--::_

Vegeta sent a twitching glare at him.

_--ah, heavy with child, can you::_ Nango corrected himself.

" Heavy with CHILD? " Vegeta cocked an eyebrow at him, gawking.

_::...well__, its not like there's that many synonyms for "pregnant" in the english language...not that many that **I**_

_know__ of anyway. I mean, there's "expectant"...::_ his tail shrugged, _::Now if you're talking synonyms for "pregnant" in_

_SAIYAGO--::_

" Shush! " Vegeta grabbed the tail out of instinct, knowing that it couldn't actually speak; not having a mouth of

its own, " I know how many different words there are for that term in my native tongue, thanks. " his cheeks flushed red. The

ouji let go of the tail and picked up one of his looser tank-tops.

_::It's not gonna work, you're too big now::_

" You've been really talkative lately, ya know that. " Vegeta sweatdropped.

The ouji sighed, " Listen, I can still pull this off. All I have to do is take a deep breath and-- "

_--that only works for stomachs! Not pregnant bellies!::_

" WHO SAID I WAS PRE--EXPEC--WITH CHILD ANYWAY! " he snapped, then started to pull the shirt over his head and down

past his stomach until..it ripped right in half, " ... "

" Kuso. " Vegeta muttered.

_::It's not like you don't have 4 more of them in the closet::_

Vegeta tossed his ripped shirt to the ground, " Well, I can't just wear one of MY shirts and expect no one to

notice the HUGE PREGNANT-LOOKING BULGE hanging out infront of me. " he folded his arms, " So now what? "

dl

/dl

dl

/dl

" I can't believe I'm going through Bulma's wardobe looking for maternity gowns. " Vegeta said flatly to himself as

he quickly pressed through Bulma's closet...a closet which took up two entire walls of her bedroom.

_::She has such wonderful taste in clothes::_ Nango said while looking at one of Bulma's evening gowns.

" Heh, I know. " Vegeta smirked. He continued his search, then pulled something out of it.

Nango looked on in horror, _::But__, it's PINK!::_

" I know that! " the ouji looked away, his cheeks flushing red with embarassment, " I was thinking maybe I could

try to pass it off as my "Bad Man" shirt.

_::It's too much of a color difference. Your "Bad Man" shirt is bright eye-piercing magenta-pink. What you have in_

_your__ hands is more of a cuddily, little girl, uke-pink::_

" You are so supportive of me. " the ouji remarked sarcastically.

_::You're welcome!::_ Nango chirped, playing along.

" Wait, how can you see what color this is! You don't have any eyes! " Vegeta exclaimed.

" ... " Vegeta hung his shoulders, " Oh nevermind. " he took the hanger off the dress and then squinted his eyes

shut as he put it on, shuddering in disgust of it as he did so. Vegeta glanced over at Bulma's mirror--which took up the 3rd

wall, with unease.

_::Wow..it actually hides it afterall::_ the tail said, impressed.

" Oh dear God I can actually pull "uke-pink" off. " the little ouji muttered in shock, " Note to self, after this

incident is done and over with, not a single pink clothing item will ever again adorn my SEME body. EVER! "

_::Don't say it like that, you'll jinx yourself!::_

" Shush, I know what I'm doing. " he adjusted the dress so it would look more like a shirt. He couldn't stick the

bottoms of the dress into his pants--which hung loosely to begin with due to him being unable to pull them up past the lump,

so he simply rolled the frilly bottom of the dress underneath itself, " No need for me to lose ALL my dignity today. " he

left the room, closing the door behind him.

" Why hello there, Miss Oujisama. " a voice snickered beside him.

" Turles. " Vegeta acknowledged, embarassed. The evil type-3 saiyajin had managed to evade Bulma, Mirai, AND Raditsu

for the remainder of the previous evening/night. Infact he was still bouncing from one hiding spot to another.

" You look great in pink, Vegeta-san. It fits you rather well. " he smirked.

" Hmmph. " Vegeta folded his arms, " No I don't. "

" Strange that you're so against being ukefied yet you go into your wife--ah, girlfriend's--she's you're girlfriend,

right? "

Vegeta sighed, " We're only partially married. Long story. "

" --closet and put on one of her dresses, a frilly little pink one too. " Turles continued without skipping a beat,

" It makes one wonder about things.. " he grinned wickedly.

" It's not like I do this every day! And I put this stupid thing on for a reason! " Vegeta snapped, his cheeks

heating up again.

" To impress Kakarrotto? " Turles gave him a cheesy, almost Goku-ish grin.

" ... " for once Vegeta's mind went blank as he stood there, still pointing at Turles from his previous anger. He

sighed, " Yeah fine sure whatever. " the ouji quickly brushed it off and walked past him towards the stairs.

Turles blinked, stunned, " What? Really? "

Vegeta continued walking down the staircase.

_::NANI!? HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT!!::_ Nango gawked, blushing furiously.

_::It'll keep him stupified for a good 5 or 10 minutes while I figure out my next move::_ Vegeta said, with an

oncoming feeling of regret a good 70 miles or so offshore, _::Besides its better than having him find out I have, whatever_

_this__ is,:: he poked his stomach, ::just below my gut::_

_::True...:: _the tail trailed off, _::But STILL!::_

Vegeta walked into the living room and past the couch only to suddenly be yanked back down onto it and engulfed in

a monstrously warm hug, " MMPH!? " he froze in place. The feeling of kaka-germs squiggling their way onto his skin easily

identifying his "attacker". Vegeta looked over his shoulder anyway and would've yelped had he not been partially-silenced by

the pajama-top over the lower half of his face. Goku stared at the little ouji with a desperate, forlorn expression as though

he hadn't seen Vegeta in years rather than 10 hours, " Umm, Kakarrotto.. " Vegeta tried to get his voice back.

" I WON'T EVER LET YOU DISAPPEAR ON ME VEGGIE NOT EVER! " Goku sobbed, hugging on tightly.

" Eh? " the ouji cocked an eyebrow.

Goku pulled away just far enough so he could see Vegeta's face while still slightly hugging him, " Oh Veggie I had

a terrible nightmare! You disappeared and after you did nobody else remembered you except for me and all your stuff was gone

and there was this glowing green note and I'll protect you Veggie I PROMISE! " he glomped hard onto Vegeta again.

The ouji sat there, his face bright red, " Ah, yes, well.. " he tried to slip out of Goku's super-grip, " You don't

need to worry about anything like that happening, Kakarrotto. And you don't need to "protect" me either. "

" But-- "

" Because I, your ouji and ruler, will be protecting YOU. " Vegeta smirked boastfully.

" Oh. " Goku nodded, sitting back onto the chair, " O--oh-kay. " he then took a good look at Vegeta and tilted his

head in confusion, " Little Veggie why are you wearing pink? "

" Ah-- " Vegeta's face returned to "bright red", " --that is, not important right now.

ButifyoumustknowitsbecauseeveryshirtIowniscurrentlyinthewasherdryerandorlaundryroom. " Vegeta quickly rattled off.

" Wow, EVERY SHIRT YOU OWN, Veggie? " Goku gasped in surprise.

" Ah haha.. " Vegeta laughed nervously, " Yeah, imagine that. "

" Poor little Veggie. " Goku frowned, " Having to wear a color he doesn't like because all his shirts are in the

wash. " he pouted, then lit up, " OH! I know! Instead of wearing that pink little dress, Veggie can just walk around in his

pants all day without a shirt--OH! Wait no its getting cold outside that would be bad for Veggie. I know! You could wear my

pajama top! " he took it off and held it out towards Vegeta.

Vegeta shifted around uneasily, " Umm, Kakarrotto I know you're being friendly and helpful and all...but you are

aware you just SLEPT in that, right? "

" So? Sometimes I use the same pajamas for several days in a row. There's nothing wrong with 'um. " Goku blinked.

" The GERMS, Kakarrotto. "

Goku looked down at his pajama shirt, which was crawling with dozens of kaka-germs, " Oh yeah. Haha, I almost forgot

about them! " he grinned cheesily and put his hand behind his head.

" Indeed. " Vegeta sweatdropped.

" Hey Vegeta? " a voice called from nearby. The ouji quickly grabbed a nearby blanket and thrust it overtop of him.

" Is this part of the game? " Goku asked, confused.

" Game? " Vegeta repeated from under the blanket, cocking an eyebrow.

" Veg--oh hi Son-kun! " Bulma said happily, walking up to them, " Why is Vegeta under a blanket? "

" I dunno. " he shrugged.

The ouji poked his head out from under, " I'm just cold, that's all. "

" Oh. " she replied, " Listen have either of you seen Turles? "

Vegeta pointed to the staircase. Bulma turned towards it to see the Turles no longer in the spot he'd been when

Vegeta had passed him moments ago, " ...well he WAS there. " he murmured, then smirked, " I think I actually surprised HIM

for once. "

_::I have a bad feeling about that, Vegeta::_ his tail nodded.

The ouji ignored him, twitching.

" You surprised him? " Bulma gawked.

" Well he just kept asking me questions so I decided to confuse him with a reply. " he smirked.

" Is that safe? " Bulma's eyes widened.

Vegeta put his hand on his chin " I'm not completely sure... "

Bulma watched him and noticed something seemed out of place in the outline Vegeta made beneath the blanket,

" Vegeta? I know this'll sound odd, but do you have something under that blanket **with** you? "

" WHAT?! " the ouji instantly froze in place.

" It looks like you have a pillow in there. " she reached down to poke Vegeta's stomach.

" BULMA! " he said loudly, causing her to stop just before she touched it.

Bulma looked down at him.

" I need to tell you something very important. Something that I myself am not even sure what it is. " he said,

trying to keep his voice steady, " But first I need to check something. " Vegeta peeked under the blanket for a second, then

looked up again, " You know I love you, right? "

" Of course I do. I love you too. " Bulma chuckled.

" Oh-kay. " the ouji took a deep breath, " Here goes. " he grabbed the blanket tightly and yanked it off to expose

his stomach.

" GASP! "

" OH MY! "

Bulma and Goku stared at him in shock.

" You're PREGNANT!? "

" Veggieswearing a DRESS!? "

Vegeta sweatdropped at Goku, " Didn't you see me just now when you pulled me onto the couch? "

" Well, yeah but I didn't notice it was a...I thought Veggie was just wearing a very long shirt. " Goku said,

puzzled.

The ouji turned back to Bulma, " ...well? "

" ... " she stood there blankly.

" Before you say anything, let me just tell you that you this lump before you appeared yesterday morning and no I

have not slept with anyone besides you. " Vegeta said cautiously, " ...at least not to my recollection. "

" ... " ▫

" Bulma? " he said, worried.

" TO THE LAB! " Bulma pointed off heroically into the distance.

" NO! " Vegeta cried out in panic.

" ... " Bulma stared at him, confused, " Don't you want to find out if its a boy or a girl? "

" WAHH! " the ouji fell over. He instantly got back up, " I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I'M PREGNANT AT ALL! " Vegeta clutched

his stomach protectively.

" If I was having a baby I'd wanna know if it were a girl or boy. " Goku spoke up.

Vegeta sweatdropped, " Well you're not having one. And neither am I! "

Bulma folded her arms, " It is very strange that you would suddenly grow like this within only a two-day span...unless that's normal for-- "

" --saiyajin males CAN'T have BABIES! It's physically impossible! " Vegeta exclaimed, " And its especially

impossible for those of royal birth. "

" I wonder what the baby's name would be... " Goku wondered.

" WHY ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT SUCH THINGS! " Vegeta yelped, gawking.

" You know, we could easily solve this by giving you a simple physical. " Bulma explained, nodding.

" A physical. " he repeated uneasily, clutching his stomach this time.

" What's wrong? "

_::Bulma I'd really rather not have a physical and discover my entire body is flooded kaka-germs not to mention an_

_unborn__ Kaka-baby::_ he sent her a psychic message.

_::But if you don't have a physical we won't be able to figure out exactly what that is, and if you are by some_

_miracle__ of both science and nature--pregnant--who the father is::_ she replied.

The little ouji looked away, _::M__--maybe its just an infection. You know, something that causes temporary bloating::_

_::Vegeta you look like you're practically halfway through your 2nd Trimester!::_

_::I'm NOT halfway though my 2nd Trimester because I HAVE NO TRIMESTERS because I'm NOT PREGNANT!::_ he frantically

shouted.

_::Vegeta listen. When was the last time we did it?::_ she questioned him.

The ouji paused for a moment, _:....I'm not sure. You?::_

Bulma sighed, _::Oh__ I don't remember either! But then again I've had a hard time remembering a lot of things lately::_

she folded her arms in thought.

_::And THAT'S why you should work less!::_ the small saiyajin said cheerfully, then felt something on his shoulders.

He looked back to see the larger saiyajin contently rubbing them, " Uh, Kakarrotto? "

" ! " Goku froze, then slowly removed his hands from Vegeta's shoulders and placed them in his pants pockets, " ... "

Vegeta and Bulma stared at him, slightly disturbed.

" I am trying to help Veggie calm down? " Goku offered.

Vegeta quickly sprayed his shoulders with peasant-repel.

" Oh, that's nice, Son-kun. " Bulma said, then turned back to Vegeta, " And you don't want to have a physical on the

basis that you're afraid of the worst possible outcome coming true? "

" Yes. " Vegeta bluntly replied.

" You don't have to worry, Veggie. I'm sure everything'll turn out fine! " Goku said confidently.

" So what you want to do is just wait this thing out and see what happens? " Bulma told the ouji, unsure.

" Hai, better to worry that I have been impregnated somehow and then find out I'm not then to think I'm not and then

find out I am and thus spiral into a mental/emotional/physical breakdown of sorts. " Vegeta decided.

" Oh. Well...I guess that makes sense. " she said, still worried about him, " You'd rather wait it out then? "

" I think so. " the ouji nodded while staring at his stomach.

" As much as I think it would be safer to just give you the checkup, I trust your knowledge of your own body. " Bulma

sighed, then said warningly, " But if just so much as the smallest thing feels off with you, PLEASE come find me. If that's

not a baby it could be something potentially dangerous. "

" You mean like some deadly, fatal disease? " Vegeta paled.

" Exactly! "

" ... " he mildly gulped.

" Don't worry Veggie, its not a disease. " Goku chirped.

The small saiyajin looked down at his stomach, " I hope not. "

dl

/dl

dl

/dl

And so, several more days passed. Vegeta's stomach didn't get any bigger, but even so he managed to avoid the

remaining household members who didn't know about his addition. He decided to just avoid wearing shirts altogether and

simply put one of his thicker bed-sheets around him when he would leave the room, and, if he ran into anyone, would simply

claim he was cold.

The small saiyajin held his stomach with one hand and the two ends of the bed-sheet with the other while he passed

the kitchen.

" Hi Veggie! "

Vegeta glanced to his left to see Goku standing there holding out the ouji's chair for him while Vejitto and Gogeta

sat delicious snacks down onto the table.

" Come get something to eat Veggie, you gotta be hungry. " the larger saiyajin offered.

Vegeta stared at them suspiciously for a moment, then did so. Goku pushed his chair in, slightly startling the ouji

and making him uncomfortable, " I can, pull my own chair in thanks, Kakarrotto. " he looked down at the cookies, cupcakes,

and donuts before him along with a large glass of milk, " So...what's this for? " the ouji glanced up to see the fusions

watching him carefully, Vejitto with an anxious grin and Gogeta with curiousity and a bit of disbelief, " Uh, what? "

" Am I really gonna be a big brother again, Mommy! " Vejitto gushed.

" ACK! " Vegeta nearly fell back in his chair only to have Goku catch it before he could do so. The larger saiyajin

smiled down at him and Vegeta flushed red with embarassment. He sat back upright and shook it off, " You TOLD them?! " he

snapped at Goku.

" ... " Goku looked away and whistled nervously to himself.

Vegeta folded his arms and closed his eyes, " I'm sorry to disappoint you two but no I am NOT pregnant, I'm merely

suffering from an infection...or an allergy...or a disease....but not a pregnancy, of that I can assure you. "

Gogeta zipped over to him and tugged at the blanket. Vegeta quickly tugged back, " Is there, really a baby in there,

Toussan? "

" NO! " Vegeta clutched his blanket over himself tight, " I mean, if there was a growing living being inside of me

then that would make one automatically assume that I had fallen uke to a certain person. "

" Why is Veggie pointing to me? " Goku blinked.

" Now, you know I would never allow such a thing to happen, being the strong, seme person that I am, do you Gogeta? "

he ignored Goku's comment.

" Yes Toussan. " the dance fusion shook his head.

" Good. Then we can safely assume that whatever is causing this situation to be, it is not the result of some hot

and steamy non-platonic interaction between my peasant and I. "

" Aw Veggie I could never break Rule Number 2 like that! " Goku exclaimed, his cheeks flushing pink.

" Yeah, I didn't think so either. " Vegeta smirked at him, then turned back and sweatdropped to see Gogeta had lifted

up his blanket and was currently staring at Vegeta's stomach with his jaw hanging open.

" Wow..." the dance fusion murmured.

" Can I see? " Vejitto poked his head beside Gogeta.

" Toussan. " Gogeta looked up at him, then grinned, " Can I listen for the baby's heartbeat? "

" WAHH! THERE IS NO HEARTBEAT AND THERE IS NO THIRD FUSION-BABY! And if there ever would be I would undoubtedly be

seme in said operation! " Vegeta folded his arms.

" It's so warm, Mommy. " Vejitto smiled as he lightly placed his hand on Vegeta's stomach.

" Ooh! I wanna touch Veggie's tummy! " Goku dangled his fingers just above the ouji's abdomen.

" AHH! " Vegeta pulled the blanket back over himself, " NO WAY! " he got up, though with slight clumsiness due to

his added stomach-weight, " I feel awkward enough as it is without having you three lining up to touch my bloated belly. "

the ouji shook his fist while he had his back to them. Vegeta reached forward and rubbed his stomach slightly. He snatched

several cupcakes and left the room.

" Little Veggie? Don't you want the rest of your yummy snacks? Or at least your glass of milk? " Goku asked,

saddened, " If you want I can give you a straw? " he plopped a silly-straw into the glass and smiled, " Eh? Eh? "

" That straw is pink. " Vegeta said flatly.

" So? "

" ... " Vegeta slapped himself on the forehead, " Pink is an UKE color, Kakarrotto! "

" Sorry Veggie...umm, I only really have one straw like this, unless you want a regular one? "

" No thank you Kakarrotto. You can have it. " the ouji sighed and headed into the living room.

Goku shrugged and started to drink the milk as he and the fusions followed Vegeta.

Vegeta was about to sit down on the couch when he saw a strange-looking box set up infront of the tv, " What the--? "

he walked up to it to see it was covered in a curtain with a paper sign written in saiyago reading "'AMOR' - a Turles

Production.", " ... "

" Hey Veggie what's that box for? " Goku asked.

" Don't say anything--just, leave. " Vegeta grabbed him by the arm and started to so only to have music suddenly

blast from behind them, causing Goku to swing around in curiousity. The larger saiyajin plopped before the box. Vejitto and

Gogeta leaned over the top of the couch to watch.

Vegeta decidedly sat down as well, " Kuso...I thought that lie was enough to shock him into leaving me along for at

least a couple days! "

The curtains parted before them to reveal Goku and Vegeta sock-puppets, the Vegeta one wearing a pink tanktop with a

large bulge at its stomach. The little ouji twitched. Turles tail flicked around a foot behind the 'stage'

" _Why__ hello, Kakarrotto, how are you today?_ " the Vegeta sock-puppet asked, Turles deepening his voice in an effort

to mimick Vegeta's.

" _I__ am doing wonderfully today, little Veggie_. " Turles's Goku-voice was dead-on, being that he was a type-3

saiyajin as well.

" Haha! " Goku himself clapped, entertained.

" _And__ how are you, Veggie? I'm surprised to see you wearing PINK, a color which does not usually a-dorn your little_

_Veggie body._ "

" Oh God he's got Kakarrotto down perfectly. " Vegeta groaned, embarassed.

" _Tee__-hee, do you like how it looks on me, Kakay?_ " the ouji sock-puppet said.

" "TEE-HEE"!? " Vegeta snapped, upset as he lept to his feet in anger only to let out a groan of pain and grabbed

his stomach, panting, " You just wait til I get over there... "

" _It__ looks great on you, Veggie_! " "Goku" clasped his hands together.

" _Well__ if you like it on me, wait'll you see it off--_ " the other sock-puppet tossed the pink shirt off to reveal

his muscled upper-body and very-apparent tummy.

Vegeta stood up and slowly started to stomp his way towards the cardboard box.

" _GASP__! Veggie! You're--you're--pregnant!!_ " the Goku sock-puppet gasped.

A spotlight appeared over the Vegeta-puppet and he turned away and landed in an overdramatic position, " _I__ know! And_

_the__ worst part is I can't even remember HOW or WHEN it happened!_ "

" _I__ remember_. "

" _You__ do?_ " the Vegeta-puppet looked over at him with a ray of hope.

" ▫Ahhhhh!▫ " miracle-esque music played for several seconds until the Goku-puppet began to speak again.

" _Yes__ Veggie, I do. It was all very sudden..._ "

The sock-puppets were instantly dragged down under the stage and replaced by hand-puppets of the duo.

The Goku and Vegeta hand-puppets walked past each other casually.

" _Hi__ Veggie._ "

" _Hi__ Kakarrotto._ "

They each left on opposite sides of the stage, then two seconds later flew at each other and began passionately

swapping imaginary saliva.

" _MMMmMMMmmmm_— "

" Oh my! PG-13! " Goku gasped and turned his head away, squinting his eyes shut and covering them with his hands as

his face glew bright pink and his tail twitched behind him, blushing equally as furiously.

" ... " Vegeta gawked at the puppets for a moment, his eyes widened 10 times over. He then regained himself and

snatched both the hand-puppets and sock-puppets from the stage. The ouji let out a snort.

Turles moved his puppet-less, gloved hands for a moment, then sat up in the box, " And they lived happily ever after!

Goodnight everybody! " he waved.

" ▫Clap▫clap▫clap▫! "

Vegeta looked back and sweatdropped to see Vejitto and Gogeta each with a sock-puppet of themselves on their right

hands clapping, " ... " he turned back to Turles only to see him no longer there, " Errr...KUSO! " the ouji angrily threw

the puppets to the ground, " Curse him. " he twitched, then glanced over at Goku, who was still sitting there shaking

lightly and glowing brightly while his hands covered his eyes, " Kakarrotto.. " he walked up to Goku and sat down beside

him.

" That was naughty Veggie! I'm not allowed to look at naughty things like that it's against rule #67! " Goku said,

his voice even shaking.

" Kakarrotto they were hand-puppets. " Vegeta said flatly, lifting one up by the end, " And you know that situation

Turles just presented in puppet-form would NEVER occur in reality. "

" Hai. " the larger saiyajin nodded, still covering his eyes.

" And that's because we only admire one another in a purely platonic way. "

" Hai. " Goku repeated, still shaking.

" Now, how about you and I and Vejitto and Gogeta all go back into the kitchen and share those "yummy snacks" they

made? " Vegeta offered, trying to calm Goku down.

" O--oh-kay. " Goku squeaked out, holding his arm towards Vegeta.

The ouji smirked and took it, feeling very semeish as he helped Goku up and led the larger saiyajin into the other

room, " Good Kakarrotto. Very good. "

dl

/dl

dl

/dl

The next day Vegeta woke up to discover his stomach had grown even larger. It wasn't 2nd Trimester, but it wasn't

3rd yet either. The second the ouji had seen it he decided he would stay hidden in his bed under the covers until either

A) He figured out a way to put an end to this madness, B) He got hungry, or C) He found a way to keep his abdomen's

largeness from being seen.

It had been three hours since he'd woken up, and Vegeta still had not left his bed. By the time the three hours had

passed all he had accomplished was that he'd convinced himself what happened to him was what he had feared had happened to

him, that he was somehow impregnated and a kaka-baby was rapidly growing inside him. Vegeta pulled his sheets up over his

nose in terror. His fear masking the more logical questions of "Why is the baby growing so fast?" "How is it

physicologically possible for me to be pregnant when I'm a male saiyajin?" and "When did I concide to allow my favorite

peasant to make love to me and how come neither of us can remember such an act?". Vegeta shook and pulled the covers over

his head, " How can this be? " he squeaked out, " I'm the Great and Powerful Saiyajin no Ouji. One of the most feared

warriors throughout the universe! Heir to the entire saiyajin kingdom! WHY AM I GOING TO BE A "MOMMY"!!! " he wailed in

horror and sobbed against his stomach, then stopped, " No. No crying. Ukes cry. And I'm no uke!! I'm going to handle this

situation with my ablility to remain calm under stress along with my vast and super-intellegent royal saiyajin intellect! "

he pointed to his brain.

" OH GOD **WHY!** " Vegeta slammed his fists onto the matress beneath him, " WHYYHHYHHYYYYYYYY! "

" ▫BRING▫ ▫BRING▫ "

Vegeta poked his head out from under the covers to see the phone in his room ringing. He reached out and grabbed it,

" Hello. " the ouji said, trying to keep his voice sounding as normal for him as possible.

" Ouji. " the voice on the other-end smirked.

" Onna. " Vegeta tried to sound as boastful as normal, but partially failed.

" So? How've you been, I haven't seen you in about a week. "

" Why would you care? I thought you disliked me. " he chuckled.

" Oh I do. I dislike you a great deal. It's just that you see--Goku-san came home last night feeling uncomfortable. "

she said, annoyed, " You wouldn't happen to know what upset him enough to throw every sock he owns into the laundry room,

would you? "

" Hm, socks eh? Can't say that I do, Onna. " the ouji snickered, mentally grateful Chi-Chi couldn't see the wrecked,

nerve-shot, tear-stained look on his face, " Perhaps my little Kaka-muffin is doing some winter-cleaning? Getting ready to

replace his old socks with new ones? "

" I somehow DOUBT that. " Chi-Chi muttered, then grinned wickedly, " So, how's your stomach? "

" HUH?! " Vegeta froze in place.

" I hear there's a bad flu virus going around. Wouldn't want you to suddenly get sick to your stomach and die. "

" Well aren't you cheerful this morning. " Vegeta said flatly, sweatdropping. He glanced at his stomach, thankful she

couldn't see that either.

" Why thank you. By the way Ouji, it's almost 12:00pm. "

" Oh. " he glanced at his alarm clock, which read 11:56am.

" ... " ▫

" ... " ▫

" **BABIES** "

" NANI!? " Vegeta nearly had a heart-attack.

" Gohan and Videl are planning on having lots of babies, grandsons and grandaughters, for Goku-san and I VERY SOON. "

she boasted, " It'll be so much easier to deal with you once I have such Ouji-Insurance. "

_::Heh, I'd like to see them try and take Kakarrotto away from me and THREE "fusion-babies!"::_ he laughed in his head,

then turned pale, " Oh my God what am I THINKING?! "

" Eh? " Chi-Chi cocked an eyebrow.

" Oh, nothing Onna. " Vegeta said casually, brushing it aside, " So, is Kakay with you? "

" Yes he is and that's where he'll be staying for the rest of the day until he loses this sudden fear of socks and

cardboard boxes. " Chi-Chi snorted, " Goodbye, Ouji. "

" Later. " Vegeta smirked and Chi-Chi hung up. The little ouji instantly let out a huge sigh of relief, " Oh geez!

ONNA! How could I have forgotten about HER reaction to---THIS! " he pointed to his stomach, " She'll ridicule me all the

way to the delivery-room! " he wailed, then paused, " But wait! If this is Kakarrotto's, which I have a sinking feeling it

is, then Onna will be enraged by the news--possibly even disown Kakarrotto! " Vegeta grinned, " And then Kakarrotto shall

come to live with me and I shall taunt Onna of my ridiculous fortune! HA! "

Vegeta looked down at his stomach and paled again, " Ohhhhhh.. " he shuddered.

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" Heh-heh, the Ouji sounds a little on-edge. He must be nearing the halfway point by now. " Chi-Chi snickered as she

set the phone down, " Honestly Goku-san, I would come with you to see the Ouji, but I know if I spoke to him in person it

would be considerably hard to restrain myself from bursting into laughter and thus destroy my entire plot. " she nodded

thoughtfully, " Don't you think? "

" ... " ▫

Chi-Chi looked over her shoulder, " Goku-sa? "

Goku looked up at her from the living room sofa with a sock on either hand, both of them clasped together.

" Goku-san, what are you doing? " she asked slightly disturbed.

The larger saiyajin instantly seperated his hands and put them behind his back, " ... "

" Are you trying to tell me something? " she lifted one of his hands up, " Are your hands cold? "

" Umm, a little. " Goku shifted around, " ...Veggiesmyfavorite, Chi-chan. "

" Yes we've well-established that fact, Goku-sa. " Chi-Chi said flatly.

" ▫BRING▫BRING▫ "

Chi-Chi got the phone, " Hello? "

Goku wandered off back to his room with the socks still on his hands.

" Hey Kaasan. "

" OH! Gohan! My genius-scholar son and soon to be father of my many many grandchildren! How ARE you! " Chi-Chi said

happily.

" Umm, actually Kaasan I was wondering if Videl and I could come over to-- "

" --discuss possible color schemes for the baby's room? "

" No. Ah, we were wondering if maybe we could come and pick up Videl's ImitationTummy3000. " Gohan asked.

" Her what?....OH! That. " Chi-Chi said, then laughed nervously, " You know what Gohan, how about I bring it over

to your place as soon as I get the chance, oh-kay? "

" But couldn't you just have Toussan teleport it here instead? "

" ... " Chi-Chi glanced up the stairs to where Goku's ki was, " He's uh, busy right now. "

" Busy? "

" With his socks...his hands are cold so I'm going to go find his mittens for him. "

" Oh...alright. " Gohan scratched his head, " You're sure you'd rather bring them here-- "

" --absolutely! "

" Sure. I guess I'll see you then. "

" Alright Gohan. Goodluck with your soon-to-be-my-MANY-grandchildren! "

" Bye. " Gohan said and the line went dead. He glanced over at Videl who was sipping coffee a couple feet away from

him, " You know, if I were a rebellious son I'd have only one child just to spite her for the years of induced studying. "

" Haha.. " Videl sweatdropped.

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" ▫Ding▫Dong▫ "

Bulma walked down the hallway with her net, " Mirai could you get that? "

" ▫Ding▫Dong▫ "

" Raditsu? "

" ▫Ding▫Dong▫ "

She sighed, " Alright. " Bulma put her net down and walked to the front door, " Hello--oh! Son-kun! Back so soon? "

she smiled.

" Umm, I've decided that I want to help Veggie 'n his Veggiebaby by keeping Veggie as comfortable as possible. " the

larger saiyajin shifted around, his cheeks flushed, " I brought pillows! " Goku perked up and held several out.

" Erm, that's nice. " Bulma let him in, " So, did Vegeta ever figure out what's wrong with him. I haven't seen him

in a couple days and it makes me nervous. " she said, worried.

" Oh Veggie's fine. " Goku smiled, " Just a lil confused. " he headed towards the stairs, " Wanna come with me to see

how Veggie is doing? "

" Sure. " Bulma said, following him up, " You know I'm just about to give up on this hunt for Turles. He's way too

hard to capture and if and when I have to erase his mind of that particular memory I'll do it the moment he decides to bring

the topic up again to you and Vegeta. "

" He is very sneaky. " Goku looked down at his hands.

" ...why are you wearing your socks on your hands? " Bulma asked.

" Oh, no reason! " Goku chimed in, then knocked on Vegeta's door, " Oh Veggie? Veggie! It's me 'n Bulma. We're here

to make you and your lil Veggiebaby comfortable—! " he said in a sing-song voice as he opened the door.

Bulma and Goku let out a gasp, " !!! "

* * *

5:59 PM 12/5/2004  
**END OF PART TWO!  
**Chuquita: YAY! 50-some kb! Hooray for normal-sized chapters!  
Goku: (to audiance) There's just one more after this!  
Chuquita: Hee— I luv normal-sized chapters. The super-long ones are mind-numbing by the time you finish writing 'um. (nods)  
Vegeta: (sighs at his a-ccursed predicament) I STILL would rather Kakarrotto have been the one to be "impregnated".  
Chuquita: Yeah but that would've been a completely different story, Veggie. The only easy part about having Goku by the one as I originally intended is it would make the ImitationTummy3000 a little easier to grasp. Afterall Goku would know what it was and that it was there so he could take it off whenever you weren't around.  
Vegeta: Ah.  
Chuquita: That's why with you, I had to make it some super-enhanced product so you wouldn't discover it was a fake. It was originally supposed to look like those items they use on sitcoms/soap operas/dramas when the script calls for a character to be pregnant.  
Vegeta: (folds arms) Well then you should've gone the easy route instead of allowing yourself AND Kakarrotto be become  
partly-influenced by outside sources of which two I can already name. (twitches at audiance, frustrated) And don't think I  
don't know which outside sources they are! The Great and Powerful Saiyajin no Ouji knows who thinks he should be uke'd!Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Calm down Veggie, you're not REALLY pregnant in the fic, you know that.  
Vegeta: Hai...but still! (pouts stubbornly)  
Goku: (smiles) But Veggie I think you'd make a good Mommy.  
Vegeta: (points to Goku) (to audiance) SEE! SEE THE FRUITS OF YOUR INFLUENCE! (grabs two pairs of super-effective earmuffs and puts one pair on Goku and the other on Chu) (nods, proud of himself) There. That should insure my safety in the role of PLATONIC **seme** for fics to come.  
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) (can barely hear anything through the super-earmuffs) WHAT?  
Goku: (playing with his earmuffs) Heehee, they're so nice 'n furry 'n warm.  
Chuquita: (starts trying to pull said earmuffs off) And, ah, now for the reviewer-replies. (nervous laugh) Haha..ha... 

To BlackDragonFury: Thanks! Yup, he's only got Goku's information so far. Veggie's erased memories are on a different cd.

Veggie did remember them :) Glad you like it!

To Hakura0: Thanks! Well they don't exactly completely 'trust' Turles yet. I know, that's why I made the Tummy3000 a

super-advanced product, to try to get around a problem that if Goku had been the one with the tummy, wouldn't have been

there. She was too into her own plan to think about the kaka-germs. Yay! Somebody noticed! Heh, thanksgiving on its own

wouldn't have made very much sense since dbz has its own version of Earth, but I started writing this just before

thanksgiving and I like the parades/floats 'n such. Their abilities are kinda between Goku 'n Veggies with cooking, so its

hard to tell.

To tea: Glad you like it! Aw, you're welcome. Heh, yeah, Veggie did get the belly. Really? Well, I can't have him reveal it,

not now anyways. Veggie finds out in Part 3 which'll wrap up this fic. :)

To PerfectCell17: Happy you like it! Yup, poor poor Veggie. He's so confused. Wow! Turles is so well-liked :)

To GogetaJr: Raditsu just doesn't trust Turles due to his tricking/taunting of both him and the others. That's why Chi-Chi's

keeping her distance from Vegeta, she's afraid she'll let it slip. Goku had nearly every ingrediant available on his

sandwich :D

To Jyae: Veggie finds out in part 3! Goku does know, only he's misinformed and thinks Veggie knows about his belly and this

is all a game.

To divastarz/hieilover: Thanks! Lol, he'd be surprised, that's for sure. Brolli'll be back a couple fics from now.

To RyukoVulpix: LOL! Poor Veggie, I bet he would end up with a breakdown that way. Maybe. Glad you like that part. Veggie 'n

his tail :) Yup! Turkey is good!

To SupersayiankingTommy: The hair changes color? Cool! Sorry 'bout that. Hope he gets better. Thanks. Veggie's all confused.

That's easily enough to make her faint. I can't reveal that just yet, eventually though.

To mkh2: Hi! I think I am going to put an exclaimation mark in the title when I got to upload this chapter. Lol! Goku

announcing it sub style sounds fun. Hai, I'm keeping them where they are for now. Goku just can't help himself sometimes :)

Veggie's so easily freaked out by certain things. That he does! :D Raditsu's just an easy target from Turles, other than

Veggie 'n Goku. Ya know if I remember correctly all of his henchmen in the movie aside from the twins were bigger than him.

Hee— it may just be released soon, or at least some information about it via Turles or the cds.

To orchideater: Aw, thanks so much. I like the title too! Especially since the last 7 of them have been one-word titles.

(I didn't even mean for them to be like that '.';; ) Goku's mini-story was fun to write. Chi-Chi's very happy with this

particular plan. Glad you liked him. Veggie's reactions are much more entertaining. Where Veggie would freak out Goku would

probably have gotten all gushy about it. I know, that was one of my main problems with shifting the Tummy3000 over to Veggie;

I had to make it some super-invention that blends in with whatever skintone its attached to and has the consistancy of a

tummy and gives off a warm radiation and all this other stuff. It's supposed to be so advanced that Veggie doesn't notice

something's off because of both that and the fact that he's so on-edge right now due to it.

To Nekoni: Hee— glad you like it! I'm pretty sure Turles'll be keeping that info. Bulma and the others have nearly given up

trying to catch him, especially with all those type-3 saiyajin techniques of his. Veggie asking for a real baby? I dunno...

Goku: Ooh! (takes the presents) Isn't that thoughtful Veggie?

Vegeta: (twitches) ...

Goku: Say Veggie, what gender will Veggiesbaby be?

Vegeta: (sweatdrops) There isn't any baby and you know it! (face flushed with embarassment)

Goku: (disappointed) Oh yeah...

To SSJ5Gogetto(SSJ3Gotenks): Thanks! Yeah, Turles does that sometimes. Can't reveal that just yet.

To Jenna & Vash: Naps are good. Bejito trying to take over Earth would end up very messy. Lol, Hiei's battle over the chips!

To Goddess Shimi: ROFL! What a funny scene. Chi-Chi trying to think up the proper word while poor Goku's getting dragged

along and Veggie's unaware Goku was staring at him. '.';; Glad you're happy that Veggie ended up with the tummy. Ah, I know

what South Park is. They're in the middle of new episodes (points to Comedy Central commerical). Heh, little scene.

Chuquita: And that's the end of Part 2! My Finals are next week but hopefully Part 3 should be up sometime next week as well. After that I have time off for WINTER BREAK!  
Goku: HOORAY for winter break!  
Vegeta: HOORAY for lets-keep-Vegeta-in-the-platonic-seme-position-he-was-in-during-the-first-half-of-the-year!  
Chuquita: ...  
Goku: ...huh?  
Chuquita: Veggie you'll be fine. Don't worry we won't let anything "bad" happen to you.  
Goku: (glomps Veggie) Yeah Veggie, we luv u! And I luv u especially so!  
Vegeta: (glows bright red)  
Chuquita: See you some time next week everyone!  
Goku: (waves while still hugging Veggie) Byebye!


	3. Baby

10:54 PM 12/7/2004  
E-mail:  
By: Chuquita  
Quote of the Week: _-from DuBZ # 122 "My Father is Vegeta. The Mysterious Youth's  
Confession..."  
__Goku: Haha! Wow I don't believe it! Vegeta's gonna be a daddy?!_

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Chuey's Corner:  
Goku: OR Mommy!  
Vegeta: (twitches) There is no BABY!  
Chuquita: Welcome to Part 3 everyone!  
Goku: (happily) Hello!  
Chuquita: This chapter may be a little bit late because my Finals are next week, if it is, I apologize for my lateness.  
Vegeta: (points to the time at the top of the page) It's pretty late at night to begin with.  
Chuquita: (embarassed) Yeah well, originally I was gonna live a day gap between Part 2 and 3 so I could work on my essays for Mass Media, but I finished one of them and I'm still fairly alert so I figured, let's start the chapter anyways!  
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) ...  
Chuquita: (grins) :D  
Goku: (randomly decides to glomp Veggie) MMMmmm———  
Vegeta: (face turns bright red) Eep!  
Chuquita: Also, I've decided that for "Kakarroujo"'s re-upload, instead of cutting Scene 11, I shall post the largest, most gigantic warning sign known to man. A sign so large it will be visible from outer space!  
Goku: (chirps) Like the great wall of China!  
Chuquita: (happily) Exactly!  
Vegeta: (pulls himself out of Goku's grasp) GAH! (heaves sigh of relief at being free) ▫WHEW▫! (glances over at Chu) ...  
Chuquita: Hey, no need to get upset Veggie, after all the next two new fics, though you are in them, star situations containing people who are not you!  
Vegeta: (confused) Eh?  
Chuquita: The Christmas Special is mainly Fusion-focused (Vejitto and Gogeta) and then there's the Piccolo Oneshot.  
Goku: The 7th Piccolo Oneshot.  
Chuquita: That it is!  
Vegeta: So...I'm "safe" for the next two new stories.  
Chuquita: Yup.  
Vegeta: Ah, good. (sits back in his chair contently)  
Chuquita: (casually while trying to keep from grinning) And then there's Fic 100...  
Vegeta: (falls over and hits the ground) ▫BOOF▫!  
Goku: (blinks) (to Chu) You know its kinda strange how it doesn't have a title yet.  
Chuquita: (laughs nervously) I know, it's been "Fic 100" for almost a year now. (to audiance) I started planning out Fic 100 way back in the middle of "Densetsu".  
Vegeta: (pales) It's going to be a long one, isn't it?  
Chuquita: Considering how many ideas for Fic 100 I've gathered since March and the fact that my average fics have about 1 to 2 months of pre-planning....(sweatdrops) Yah it'll be pretty long. BUT! I promise to have normal sized chapters throughout that fic. That means around 50 to 60kb per chapter. Big chapters result in mental burnout and mental burnout seriously messes me up for at least a couple days.  
Vegeta: Like me when I over-train in 500x gravity and pass out from dehydration; which, though rarely; does happen.  
Chuquita: Exactly, Veggie.  
Goku: (smiles) I can hydrate Veggie! (offers Veggie a pepsi) :)  
Vegeta: (smirks) Why thank you Kakarrotto, how thought-- (notices little kaka-germs squiggling all over the can) (pales) --less I almost was to drink a pepsi covered in kaka-germs and thus cause them to flood into my blood-stream and disable my semeness on me.  
Goku: ? (tilts head) (warmly) I luv u too, Veggie!  
Vegeta: ?!  
Chuquita: And now for Part 3!

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Summary: Chi-Chi's decided to teach Veggie a lesson on trying to steal Goku once and for all using Videl's ImitationTummy3000 But will Goku be able to stand by while she goes through with it? And will Veggie be able to hide the strange goings on with his belly and simply hope its nothing more than a stomach-ache or will he be forced to deal with one of his biggest kaka-related fears of all? And what will he do when he finds out the added tummy-weight is a fake?

**Part 3 Chapter Titles: Technically.. l Accusations! Curse you, Kaka-germs! l Daydream l Super Veggie! Whoosh! l Gohan's back. Chi-Chi's Predicament! l I think that worked a little TOO well l The Truth about Veggie's Baby l Numb l "I'm Fine." l Happily Ever After? l**

* * *

" Vegeta?! "

The little ouji looked up. He was sitting in the middle of his bed, shirtless and gently rubbing his tummy with a

confused, dazed look on his face.

" Wow...its even bigger than I thought. " Bulma murmured, shocked.

Goku walked up to the smaller saiyajin and smiled, " Hey Veggie. " he waved.

" Making up your own sock-puppet play, I see. " Vegeta sweatdropped, trying to hide his embarassment at being caught

in the position he was in. The ouji tried to sit up properly only to let out a little moan.

" Oh Veggie lemmie help you! " Goku exclaimed, helping prop Vegeta up with the pillows he brought, " There. " he

smiled, content.

Bulma walked over to Vegeta and gave him a kiss on the cheek, " Hey there, how you doing? " she said, trying to keep

him calm. Bulma patted Vegeta on the shoulder and rubbed it, " Feeling oh-kay? "

" Nanda quo ne doun ta bo. " Vegeta mumbled, nervous.

" Huh? " Goku blinked, confused. Bulma shrugged at him, not knowing saiyago either.

" I think I'm having a baby. " he squeaked out, terrified.

" Oh Veggie I'm so HAPPY for you! " Goku gushed, glomping him.

" EEP! " Vegeta's face turned bright red.

" Son-kun, don't you know what this means? " Bulma sweatdropped.

" That Veggie's gonna be a Mommy? That we get to pick out baby names? That Ji-chan and Goggie are gonna be big

brothers or a brand new little brother or sister? " the larger saiyajin said with big sparkily eyes.

" Well, yes, but I was thinking more along the lines that if Vegeta's correct in assessing his condition...then that

means at some recent point in time someone impregnated him! "

" Oh. " Goku said.

" ... " ▫

" ... " ▫

The larger saiyajin glanced at Bulma and Vegeta, " ...why are you looking at me? "

Vegeta's face turned red with embarassment and shock, " Uh, Kakarrotto...uh... "

" ? " Goku tilted his head to the side.

" Bulma can I speak with Kakarrotto in private? " the ouji asked, his face flushing an even brighter red.

" Well alright. " Bulma got up, " I'll wait in the hallway for you. "

Vegeta nodded, then waited until the door closed behind her.

" Veggie? "

" Kakarrottoareyouthefather? " the smaller saiyajin said quickly, avoiding eye-contact.

" Father..? You mean Veggiesbaby's Toussan? " Goku blinked.

The ouji nodded sharply, starting to perspire.

" Umm... " Goku scratched his head, _::Well I did strap the Tummy3000 to Veggie's tummy, and I did put some ki inside_

_it__; all like Chi-chan told me to, so...::_ " Technically I guess I am. " he thought outloud, cheerful.

Vegeta's eyes widened 10 times over and he fell sideways onto the floor like a brick of lead, " ▫THUMP▫! "

" Veggie? " Goku peered over the edge of the bed, " VEGGIE!? "

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" So, you're the father, huh? " Bulma said in awe as she and Goku sat in the waiting room of her lab. Vegeta was

laying on a nearby couch with his back facing them. The ouji shifted uneasily.

Goku quietly nodded, " Hai. " he then bolted to attention, " ButIdidntbreakRuleNumber2BulmaIswearIdidnt! " he quickly

spat out.

Bulma sweatdropped, not ever really bothering to memorize that many of the rules Chi-Chi had placed on the larger

saiyajin back at the onset of the Kaka-war, " Rule Number 2 is...? "

" No non-platonic love-making with little Veggies. " Goku twiddled his thumbs, paraphrasing.

" OH. " she said, enlightened. Vegeta's face flushed bright red at the word 'love-making', the glow briefly capable

of being seen, " Wait, how can he be pregnant if there was no intercourse involved? "

" You should be asking "how can be he pregnant if he's a male saiyajin". " Vegeta muttered numbly from his spot. He

looked over his shoulder, " I'll tell you what I think it is--its those KAKA-GERMS! " he shouted shakily, sitting back up.

" Veggie be careful your baby-- " Goku started out, worried.

" There's no other logical explaination! I severely doubt Kakarrotto came into my bedroom one night while I was still

asleep and made non-platonic advances upon me! And if such a situation had ever come to pass knowing Kakarrotto he'd want to

wake me up first so I could share in the non-platonic "fun". But that's besides the point! The fact is that the day I woke up

with my stomach starting to grow, there were KAKA-GERMS beside me in bed! Kakarrotto was probably having some crazed

kaka-nightmare and the germs somehow misinterpreted him and used their magical kaka-powers to impregnate me with your seed!"

" His "seed"? " Bulma sweatdropped.

" You have any better ideas for the origin of the kaka-baby inside me? " the ouji sighed.

" ...you're sure its Son-kun's. "

" HEY! Kakarrotto does not lie! " Vegeta snorted. Goku smiled warmly at him, " Besides its ki signiture is

near-identical to his own. "

" WAH! " Goku nearly fell over.

" I know, its just that, I mean the germs having that much power seems a little much, don't you think? " Bulma folded

her arms in deep thought, " Why would they do it now? Why not earlier? "

" Because its easier for them to pierce my mental barriers once they've softened me up enough. " he grumbled.

Goku poked the ouji in the arm, " Haha, soft like a warm little pillow, Veggie! "

" That makes me feel so much better, Kakarrotto. " Vegeta sarcastically remarked.

" Mmm! " he glomped the smaller saiyajin.

" EEP! "

" Hm...you know when you think about it this whole situation doesn't seem to properly fit. "

" Huh? " Vegeta looked over at her.

" I mean the whole fact that its Goku's baby yet the two of you didn't have sex, and the fact that the baby's growing

so quickly. "

" And that I'm a MALE saiyajin. " Vegeta added, " ...what are you getting at? "

" I think this entire situation was created out of revenge. " Bulma nodded, then stared at the ouji, " Revenge on

you. "

" Me? " Vegeta said flatly, pale.

" But who would **ever** want to harm Veggie! " Goku gasped.

" Freeza, Cell, all of Freeza's minions that you've killed, any one person from any of the planets Freeza had you

destroy... " Bulma rattled off.

" That's a long list. " the ouji sweatdropped, " I really think I'd prefer my kaka-germ theory. "

" I could call Enma's and see if anything unusual has happened there in the past couple weeks! " Vejitto happily

chimed in.

" ?! " Vegeta spun around to see him and Gogeta suddenly standing in the lab with them.

" Hi! " Gogeta waved.

" Could you, Vejitto? " Bulma asked.

" Yup! " the portara fusion nodded. He dashed to the other end of the room and pulled out a cellphone, then began to

dial.

Gogeta stared at Vegeta for a moment, " Toussan. I want you to know that even though you're the one carrying my new

little baby brother or sister I still think of you as my Toussan. "

" Well, that's a mild relief. " the ouji smiled weakly, then thought of something and smirked, " Hey Kakarrotto, can

I be its "Toussan"? "

" Huh? But Veggie how could you be the Toussan if you're the one who's pregnant? " Goku looked confused.

The ouji laughed with a mixture of delight and nervousness from his current situation, " Not now, I mean later, when

our chil-- " he almost got dizzy again at the reality of it, " --our..child... " Vegeta glanced up to see the larger saiyajin

smiling warmly at him again. He let out another half-panicked laugh, " --is old enough to start pronouncing words that I can

be "Toussan" and you can be "Kaasan". "

" Yeah! " Gogeta gushed, wagging his tail, " That's a GREAT idea Toussan! "

" Mommy that's not fair! You can't just swap titles like that be-cause you don't wanna be the mommy! " Vejitto

exclaimed, walking over to them. He glanced over at Bulma, " By the way, Enma says nobody's caused any trouble within the

past couple weeks. "

" Huh. " she replied, baffled.

" Yeah Veggie, don't you like being Ji-chan's Mommy? " Goku asked, hurt.

Vejitto sniffled in a mock, overdramatic anguish. Goku's eyes watered up.

Vegeta frowned, starting to feel bad about his sudden idea.

" Don't let 'um get to you Toussan! You gotta stay pla-tonic seme cuz if you don't you won't be able to protect

Kaasan from all the terrible things and people who wish to do him harm! " Gogeta explained, worried, " You know what its like

out in space! There are people out there who would hurt Kaasan without even asking who he is first! And then there's Onna! If

your brain's all mushied up and ukefied you won't be able to keep Kaasan safe from Onna and her evil rules! "

" You're right! Only as the seme in my platonic relationship with Kakarrotto am I capable of defending him from all

whom desire to harm him! " he pounded his chest with pride.

" GO TOUSSAN! " Gogeta pumped his fist in the air.

Vegeta beamed with his natural, royal, in-chargeness.

" ... " Goku and Vejitto stared blankly at them. Vejitto smirked. Not a Veggie-ish smirk but a more Goku-ish one.

Not that Goku really smirked that often, and when he did it was while sparring with the little ouji.

" Come on Goggie. " Vejitto walked up to him and lifted the slightly smaller dance fusion up, then carried him back

upstairs.

" Aww. " Gogeta pouted, " And I was just starting to really get into it to. "

" It's oh-kay. We can have cake instead. " Vejitto said happily.

" HAI! I luv cake, Jitto! " Gogeta grinned, switching gears into more food-related thoughts.

The door closed behind them. Vegeta looked back at Goku, who had a small smile on his face, " Uh... "

Goku glomped the little ouji while avoiding the pregnant belly, " I think you're gonna be the best Mommy in the whole

wide world, Veggie. " he whispered.

Vegeta's face turned bright red and he began to nervously laugh again, " Ha..hahhah..HHAHAHAHAHAHA... "

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" Hmmhmmhmm, hmmhmmhmm. " another day had passed and Goku was still at Capsule Corp, the large saiyajin having slept

over in one of the guest rooms. He HAD wanted to sleepover in Vegeta's room but the ouji was already a nervous wreck as it is

and gave him a healthy "NO".

Currently Goku was helping Bunni wash out some of Trunks and Bura's old baby-bottles. He stopped drying the one in

his hand for a moment and smiled fondly at it. Soon he'd be feeding his and Veggie's baby with it.

_::You're not really buying into all this, are you?::_ Bibishii said, shocked.

" Hmm? " Goku glanced over at his tail, a dazed, content look on his face.

_::Come on Goku! You KNOW there's no baby!::_

" What do you mean? " he looked concerned.

" Goku-chan, sweetie! " Bunni chirped as she handed him another wet baby-bottle of the many she was currently

washing in the kitchen sink.

" Huh, oh. " Goku took it from her and started to dry it off, _::What__ are you talking about Bibishii?::_

His tail sweatdropped, _::Goku__! This isn't a game anymore! I don't even think it was a game to begin with! I think_

_Chi-Chi tricked you! If you don't tell Vegeta what's really going on you could breach your entire trust with each other!::_

" I would NEVER lie to my Veggie, Bibishii-chan! " Goku pleaded to her. Bunni glanced over at Goku and his tail,

confused, " Never ever! Not to Veggie! "

_::Is it that tempting of a dream for you to fall right into it when you know you're the one who put that thing on_

_him__ to begin with! I know Chi-Chi tricked you but--::_

_::--Chi-chan said Veggie was oh-kay with it. She told me so herself before I even did it!::_ Goku exclaimed.

_::But there's no logical reason for that! Chi-Chi and Vegeta rarely, if ever, get along. WHY would they something_

_like__ this up? They didn't! Vegeta doesn't know! She probably wants to SCARE him! Scare him badly enough so that it could_

_do__ serious damage TO your relationship with him!::_

_::Aw Bibishii, I'd never leave my Veggie. And Veggie would never leave me::_ he reassured her.

_::And you're sure you're not slipping off into this accidental self-made fantasy of yours::_ Bibishii checked, just to

make sure.

Goku nodded, _::Ab__-solutely not!::_

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_:::Warm. Everything was so sunny and warm. Vegeta sat up and rubbed his eyes. He stood up and was shocked to find his_

_equalibrium__ completely back to normal. The ouji quickly pulled up his tank-top to reveal his physically fit, non-pregnant_

_stomach__. His first thought was shock, then fear of what happened to it. Vegeta's second thought was to assess his situation_

_and__ where he happened to be._

_" Hn. " he poked his head out a nearby window, " A cozy little kaka-hut plopped ontop of __Mount__Paozu__. " Vegeta_

_grimaced__ slightly, " I must be dreaming. " the ouji hopped out the window and backed up. He sweatdropped to see it wasn't_

_even Goku's usual house, which for some reason was missing from its usual spot on Mount Paozu just 5 or 6 feet from where he_

_was__ standing. He sensed around and didn't feel Chi-Chi's ki in the area at all, " Hmm, this could turn out to be a rather_

_pleasant__ dream. " he hopped back inside and reached for the door to the living room._

_" ▫Ahhhhhhh_——▫_ " music suddenly exploded from around the door, causing Vegeta to jump back in fright._

_" ... " the ouji nervously headed towards the door again and this time grabbed the door._

_" ▫Ahhhhhhh_——▫

_Vegeta flung it open only to have two warm lumps launch at his knees and knock him onto his back, " OOF! "_

_" Toussan! "_

_" Toussan! "_

_The small saiyajin sat up and sweatdropped to see a chibinized Vejitto and a chibinized Gogeta glomping onto him._

_They didn't look any older than Trunks and Goten, " Umm, hello? "_

_" We luv u Toussan! " Gogeta chirped._

_" Mmmhmm! You're the best! " Vejitto cheerfully added._

_" Why thank you, my sons. " he smirked, _::Looks like I was right. Other than the two of them being reduced to child

size, nothing else in this dream seems the least bit off::_ Vegeta tried to get up, " Do you...think you could let go? "_

_The two chibi fusions just smiled contently up at him._

_" Haha..hahaha.. " Vegeta laughed nervously, then hovered upward and flew into the living room instead. Said_

_living__ room looked incredibly comfortable with its large, overly plush couches and thick fuzzy carpeting. The lighting was_

_bright__ but not blindingly so, " Even the inside of this place looks mushy. "_

_Vejitto and Gogeta slid off Vegeta's lower legs and ankles and onto the floor. They bounced for a moment and laughed_

_at__ how easy it was to bounce on. Gogeta bounced a couple more times and grinned._

_Vegeta walked over to one of the couches and sat down only, " Ahh.. " he sighed at the sheer comfort level, then was_

_nearly__ sucked into the couch as he sank half a foot deep, " ACK! WAHWAHWAH! " Vegeta scrambled back towards the front of the_

_cushions__ and panted._

_" You oh-kay Toussan? " Vejitto asked._

_" Yeah I'm fine. " Vegeta smiled weakly at him, then paused, " Wait did you just call me Toussan? "_

_" ? " Vejitto tilted his head._

_" VEGGIE. "_

_The ouji froze at the sound of the voice coming from a doorway beside him. The sheer amount of mushy-gushiness in_

_Goku's tone was enough to keep him from avoiding eye-contact altogether with the larger saiyajin; not to mention avoid even_

_looking__ in his direction to begin with. He felt his entire face flush bright red._

_Goku walked over to Vegeta and sat beside him on the couch, " Veggie? "_

_" Kakarrotto. " Vegeta stiffly acknowledged._

_" Would you like to hold 'um? "_

_Vegeta cocked an eyebrow and turned his head towards him, " Kakarrotto what are you talking abou-- "_

_Goku sat there smiling at him with his tail flicking back and forth lightly behind him. In his arms he held a_

_saiyajin__ infant, no more than 1 or 2 months old. The baby had a blanket around its body so Vegeta was unable to tell which_

_gender__ the baby was. The fact that the blanket was orange didn't help his short mental deliberation any._

_" Umm-- "_

_" Would you like to hold 'um, Veggie? " Goku asked again, proudly beaming at the little baby in his arms._

_" --hai? " Vegeta answered in dazed confusion._

_The larger saiyajin handed the sleeping baby to Vegeta, who held the baby against him. The sleeping infant nuzzled_

_against__ him. Goku leaned against Vegeta's shoulder and the chibinized fusions hopped up onto either of the ouji's knees. All_

_three__ of them giving him happy genuine smiles._

_Vegeta shifted around, uncomfortable and uneasy at the excess warmth being directed at him. He didn't like all that_

_warmth__ in one place. Mushiness clouds and brings down your defenses. The ouji started to sweat, nervous._

_The saiyajin baby Vegeta was holding opened its eyes and stared up at him in naive, utter adoration._

_Vegeta froze._

_" ▫POW_▫_! " the roof on the small, cozy little kaka-hut ontop of __Mount__Paozu__ exploded, revealing three huge,_

_malicious-looking__ monsters looming over them. They looked like oozaru-sized, evil versions of Freeza, Chi-Chi, and Brolli;_

_all__ with glowing red eyes. Well, Freeza and Brolli were evil to begin with--but that didn't matter right now._

_Action._

_Vegeta smirked. Now **this** was something he knew how to deal with._

_" EEP! VEGGIE HELP! " Goku cried out, latching onto the ouji's arm. The chibi fusions looked equally as scared and_

_glanced__ at Vegeta pleadingly._

_" Save us Toussan! " Gogeta yelped._

_Vegeta stood up and puffed his chest out with pride, " Of course I will! " he turned to Goku, " Would you mind_

_holding__ the baby, Kakarrotto? "_

_" Of COURSE, Veggie. " Goku smiled and took the infant back from the little ouji._

_Vegeta hopped onto the top of the couch and grinned wickedly at the monsters above him, " You think you rip off the_

_my__ house and threaten my family and Kakarrotto without any royal retribution! HA! " he burst into ssj2, " PREPARE TO MEET_

_YOUR__ FATE AT THE HANDS OF **SUPER VEGETA!** "_

_" Hooray! " Goku and the chibi fusions cheered._

_Vegeta whipped out a red cape and tied it around his neck, " Heh. I could get used to this part of the dream. " he_

_grinned__, then blasted off the couch, attacking the giant Freeza first, " HAAAAAAA! " Vegeta kneed the giant Freeza in the_

_gut__, then kicked him up into the sky, " BIG BANG ATTACK_—_! " he sent the ki blast hurtling at Freeza's mid-section where it_

_pierced__ his chest with the same powerful precision'd incision that Freeza had killed him with so long ago. The blast killed_

_the__ giant Freeza instantly. He hit the ground with insatiable force, causing the entire mountain to quake. Vegeta grinned_

_wildly__ and decided to garriku ho Freeza's head out of joyous revenge, which he did._

_" This is a FUN dream! " Vegeta practically gushed, then landed onto a nearby tree-branch and cracked his knuckles._

_" IS it now? "_

_Vegeta's head whipped to the left to see the giant Brolli holding Goku captive and the giant Chi-Chi holding Vejitto_

_and__ Gogeta captive, " WAHHHHHHH!! " he then quickly looked down to see the baby was thankfully safe on one of the plush_

_couches__, though it looked terrified at the sight above._

_" It's against the rules to live happily ever after, you know. " the giant evil Chi-Chi grinned wickedly._

_" I'll squeeze your organs right out of your body. " the giant evil Brolli laughed maniacally at Goku who he had_

_clasped__ inside his hand with the exception of the saiyajin's head._

_" AAHH! SAVE __US__ VEGGIE! " Goku cried out._

_Vegeta burst into ssj3 while glaring at the two giants, " Consider it done. " he blasted off at them while forming a_

_large__ ball of ki in either hand to the point where they looked like miniture genki-damas. Vegeta prepared to throw them at_

_the__ giants, then teleported away at the last second to behind them and shot the mini-genki-damas from there. Vegeta_

_teleported__ again, this time to within the line of fire where he quickly grabbed Goku, Gogeta, and Vejitto and dashed out of_

_the__ way just in time for the attacks to engulf the giant Broll and Chi-Chi, disintergrating them. The ouji landed back on_

_the__ floor of the living room and set the trio down, " There. All is well! " he said proudly, putting his hands on his hips_

_as__ his red cape fluttered in the wind._

_" YAY! "_

_" WHOOHOO! " they appluaded and cheered him on._

_" Oh THANK YOU for saving us Veggie! " Goku glomped him tightly, then picked the baby back up, who was relieved to_

_be__ back with its parents, " You're the GREATEST! "_

_" Number 1? " an amused smile tugged at Vegeta's lips._

_Goku nodded excitedly, " Number **1**, Veggie! "_

_" Heh-heh-heh...haha....BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...:::_

" ▫PuuuuuuuuuuuuRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrr————▫ " Vegeta purred loudly from under the covers. Goku

flushed bright pink as he walked down the hallway, passing Vegeta's bedroom door halfway through the purr. The larger

saiyajin almost forgot where he was headed to for a second, but the fuzzines passed and he continued on.

Vegeta opened his eyes and stared up at the ceiling with a content smile on his face. He looked forward at his

stomach and smirked, " I think I'm actually going enjoy having another "fusion-baby" around after all. " he patted his

stomach lightly, then flopped his head back onto the pillow and sighed, " Ah, what a wonderful semetastic dream that was.. "

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And so, another day passed...

" Where IS he!? " Chi-Chi exclaimed, staring out the window.

" Where's who, Kaasan? " Goten asked.

She twitched, " Your Toussan. He left for the Ouji's 3 days ago and still hasn't come back! " Chi-Chi folded her

arms, " Something must've happened to him. " she paled.

" ▫Ding▫Dong▫ "

Chi-Chi grinned, " Goku-san? " she flung open the door to reveal..., " Gohan. " Chi-Chi said blandly.

Gohan sweatdropped, " Umm, hi? "

" Come in. " she sighed, opening the door.

" So, Kaasan, how are you doing? "

" Goku-san left three days ago and hasn't come back from the Ouji's yet so I'm going over to bring him back. " she

put her hands on his hips.

" Really? " Gohan said, concerned, " What did he go over there for? "

" Ah-- " Chi-Chi started, then froze, _::Kuso! Do I dare tell Gohan that for the past week and a half I've been using_

_Videl's ImitationTummy3000 to mentally scar the Ouji's mind in a way that he would never even think about trying to steal_

_Goku-san to the non-platonic side ever again?::_ she glanced over at Gohan.

The demi-saiyajin raised an eyebrow intellegently.

_::Perhaps if he were still my sidekick and under my household's rules...however that time has passed. And so--::_

" --sparring. He went to the Ouji's house to go spar with him in the gravity room. " she lied.

" But doesn't Toussan usually spar with Vegeta outside? "

" It was raining. "

" Oh. "

" ... " ▫

" ... " ▫

" So you uh, need a lift? I could take you there after I get the ImitationTummy3000 back. " Gohan offered.

" HUH!? "

" That's why I'm here actually. " Gohan smiled sheepishly, " I had some free time on my hands so I figured I'd come

down and pick it up. "

Chi-Chi laughed nervously, " Well...isn't that, nice. "

" Umm, sure. " Gohan looked confused at the comment, " Where is it? "

" Where's what? "

" The Tummy3000. "

" Ooh! I know I know! " Goten raised his hand eagerly, " It's on-- "

Chi-Chi put her hand over the chibi's mouth, " --the countertop--in mybedroom! Yes! The countertop in my bedroom.

Please excuse me while I go get the Tummy3000 which belongs to Videl, for you so you can give it back to her. " she backed up

towards the staircase, then ran up it and into her room. Chi-Chi closed and double-locked the door behind her, " ▫WHEW▫! Oh

boy...I can't have Gohan find out about this! " she opened the window and stuck her head out, " KINTO'UN! "

The little orange cloud zipped over to her. Chi-Chi hopped out the window and onto him, " To the Ouji's house! And

HURRY! " and with that Kinto'un flew off, _::If I'm gone for too long Gohan will start to suspect something's wrong. I can't_

_have__ that happen!::_

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" ▫Knock▫Knock▫Knock▫! " Chi-Chi demandingly knocked on the front door to Capsule Corp.

" ▫FWEEP▫! " a sudden New Years Noisemaker blew infront of her.

" ?! " Chi-Chi shook her head and sweatdropped to see Vejitto standing there grinning while Gogeta--holder of the

noisemaker--stood beside him. Both fusions had on party hats. Gogeta's shirt read "I'm Going to be a Big Brother!" and

Vejitto's read, "I'm Going to be a Big Brother--Again!". The fusions had excitable Goku-ish grins on their faces,

" Demi-Oujis. " she acknowledged them.

" Oi Chi-Chi! " Vejitto said happily, " Welcome to the party! " he plopped a party hat on her head.

" Heeheehee. " Gogeta giggled at the sight, entertained.

" Thanks. " she said flatly, twitching at the object that now sat upon her head. It was then Chi-Chi got her first

good look at the inside of the room, which was decorated ceiling to floor with "New Baby" and "Welcome the New Addition"

banners, half of them blue and half of them pink since no one exactly knew which gender Vegeta's "baby" was going to be.

Chi-Chi glanced around. Bunni was cutting a large chocolate "Congradulations, Vegeta" cake at the kitchen table and giving

slices to Trunks, an almost-Goku-level-of-giddyness Turles, and a lost-and-confused-looking Bura. Mirai was sitting at the

other end of the table murmuring in disbelief wondering "where he had gone wrong" while maps of several timelines were

spread on that end of the table before him.

Chi-Chi's shoulders slumped in confusion, " What's going on here? "

" Hey everybody! Guess who's up and ready for lunch! " Goku gushed warmly as he and Bulma exited Vegeta's room; the

larger saiyajin wheeling Vegeta down the hallway towards the stairs in a wheelchair, not wanting the ouji to have to struggle

walking and upset the baby. Speaking of the "baby" Vegeta looked only a few mere days from being due. Goku wheeled Vegeta to

the top of the stairs.

Bulma pulled out a remote and pressed a button, causing the stairs to now move downward like an escelator. Goku

patted the little ouji on the shoulders, causing his face to flush red. They got to the bottom of the stairs only to be

greeted by Chi-Chi standing before them with her jaw hanging open.

" Why Onna! What a delightful surprise! " Vegeta spoke up, " Here to congradulate me on the coming event of my 6th

child? "

" o.O " Chi-Chi just gawked at him.

" Veggie's gonna be a MOMMY Chi-chan, isn't that GREAT! " Goku gushed, nuzzling the smaller saiyajin.

" If you're gawking at the stairs it was nothing. I just set that up so that Vegeta can get up and down the stairs to

his room more easily without straining his energy to teleport himself and his son or daughter. " Bulma explained.

" I was thinking Veggie 'n I could name it Veggie Jr. if its a boy and Geta if its a girl. " Goku chirped contently.

" O.o "

" Perhaps we'll get one of each, you never know. " Vegeta smirked.

" Aww—! " Goku gave him a soft hug as not to disturb the baby.

" **HAVE**** YOU ALL GONE INSANE!!** " Chi-Chi shouted at the top of her lungs.

" ? " the entire room instantly turned toward her.

" Chi-chan what are you talking about? " Goku blinked.

" Oh come ON Goku-san! Don't tell me you've gotten so sucked into this little "Veggie's havin' a baby" fantasy that

you actually believe it now! " she took a stomp towards him.

Goku backed himself and Vegeta up, " Chi-chan don't make loud noises! " he hushed her, worried.

" Yeah, I'm due any day now. You wouldn't want to break my water early on me. " Vegeta folded his arms, annoyed.

" YOU HAVE NO WATER TO BREAK YOU EVIL TWISTED LITTLE OUJI! "

" Heh, looks like SOMEONE'S in denial. " Vegeta snickered.

" I'm NOT the one in denial! That would be GOKU-SAN! " she pointed accusingly at him.

" Huh? " Goku blinked, baffled.

Vegeta looked back and forth between them, " AHH! Now I get it! " he smirked at Chi-Chi, " You're jealous. "

" What? " she stared at him incrediously.

" You're jealous that I'm having Kakay's baby, something that, prior to this, was only available to you. "

" And you're HAPPY about being inpregnated by Goku-san?! " Chi-Chi gawked in disbelief.

Vegeta folded his arms, " Well, I have to admit, at first the I was terrified, horrified, freaked out beyond belief

that my lower body now contained a growing, soon-to-be-born kaka-baby. But then, came the dream. " a spotlight appeared over

him.

" ... " Chi-Chi's mouth hung open in shock, " Oh God no.. " she slapped herself on the forehead.

" And in this dream, I believe, my subconsious was trying to tell me something. It told me; "it's oh-kay that you've

been impregnated by the powers of a gang of rogue kaka-germs, Vegeta; as long as you stay the platonic-seme in your platonic

relationship with Kakarrotto, everything will be fine". " the spotlight disappeared, " And so it is. " the ouji said wisely.

" Was I in this dream? " she said flatly, twitching.

" Oh yes. You were a giant red-eyed monster attacking Kakarrotto's little kaka-hut. I killed you. " Vegeta said

cheerfully.

Chi-Chi twitched even more.

" I also killed Freeza and Brolli, and was able to sustain ssj3 for a prolonged period of time. AND Kakarrotto called

me HIS "Number One". "

_::No wonder he's so cheerful, he's been feeding his own ego all last night::_ Chi-Chi shook her fist in fury as she

stood with her back to Vegeta, " I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! "

" Be-lieve it! " Goku chirped.

" Hmmph. " Chi-Chi smirked, turning around to face them, " Well Ouji, I'd like to see how full of it you are once you

find out that you won't be HAVING any "kaka-baby" at all! "

" RRRRRRrrrr.. " the little ouji snarled, then grabbed her by the collar, " You harm my child and I shall snap you

like a twig. " he said dangerously, actually startling Chi-Chi for a moment until she realized the reason for his sudden

overprotective outburst of rage. Vegeta was still growling at her while Goku and Bulma looked on, uneasy.

" Stupid Ouji! I didn't mean I was gonna kill it! I mean there's no child to begin with! You're NOT PREGNANT,

GENUIS! " Chi-Chi snapped, pulling herself free.

" Huh? " Vegeta stared at her in a dazed stupor, " What are you talking about of course I'm pregnant! LOOK AT ME!

PUT YOUR HAND ON MY STOMACH ITS WARM AND ITS GOT A KAKA-ISH KI INSIDE! "

" That ki was planted in there! It's a FAKE, Ouji! " she exclaimed, upset at both Vegeta himself and that Goku was

currently protectively holding onto the smaller saiyajin in the wheelchair from behind; rubbing him.

" YOU LIE! " Vegeta spat, his hands over his 'tummy'.

" No Ouji. I'm telling the TRUTH! And GOKU-SAN knows it! " she pointed to Goku, who froze, " And do you know WHY he

knows it? Because he was THERE when we put it on you late last night two WEEKS ago! Infact, he was the one who ATTACHED that

DEVICE to you and put his KI inside! "

" ... " Vegeta stared at his stomach, then looked up at Goku as if to say 'it's not true, is it Kakay'?.

The larger saiyajin's eyes instantly watered up, " OH VEGGIE! " he sobbed, holding onto him tightly, " I wanted it to

be true so BADLY! I thought maybe if I played along long enough it'd turn to out be a baby for real! I'M SO SORRY!!! "

" ... " the smaller saiyajin sat there, numb. He looked down at his naked upper-body, poking his stomach lightly,

" But..then HOW... "

Goku gently lifted Vegeta out of his chair, then held his finger shakily over a spot on the ouji's back, squinted his

eyes shut, and pressed it.

" ▫Pop▫! " the Tummy3000 popped off of Vegeta and tumbled onto the floor, regaining its usual clear color once it

did so.

Vegeta stared at the object, which looked like it was made out of some high-tech plastic. Goku held him tightly from

behind.

" OH VEGGIE PLEASE FORGIVE ME CHI-CHAN SAID IT WAS A GAME AND I THOUGHT IT WAS TOO FOR A WHILE AND THEN WHEN I WAS

WASHING THE BABY BOTTLES I-- " he broke into jagged sobs.

" ... " Vegeta continued to stare at the object on the floor which had been his "baby" only half a minute ago.

" This, " Chi-Chi picked the object up, " is the ImitationTummy3000. A pregnancy-training device of Videl's that she

and Gohan bought at the Baby Boutique across the street. And now that I have it back, I can return it to them. " she

explained to Goku and Vegeta. Vegeta was still quiet and Goku still bawling against the ouji's back begging for forgiveness

from the smaller saiyajin.

" So...I'm not gonna be a big brother afterall? " Gogeta sniffled, hurt.

Vejitto glanced over at Goku and Vegeta, then back at Chi-Chi, " That was mean, Chi-Chi! " he sniffled as well.

She sighed, " It was MEANT to be a joke. I didn't think Goku-san would get himself emotionally wrapped up in it! "

" What about TOUSSAN! " Gogeta glared at her.

" He has the knowledge of knowing that he hasn't been uke'd in any way shape or form by Goku-san. " she shrugged,

disappointed, " Come on Goku-san, let's get back to the house before Gohan realizes I'm gone. "

" But-- " Goku held on even tighter to the little ouji before him, " --I don't wanna go. I don't wanna leave Veggie

here like this! Veggie's HURTING inside! "

" HURTING inside? HA! He's the OUJI, Goku-san. He's not "sensitive" or "mushy" or anything like that. He didn't want

to be pregnant in the first place! "

Vegeta looked down at his actual stomach, which felt unusually empty.

" NOW Goku-san. " Chi-Chi let out a tired groan as she pointed to the front door.

Goku looked down once more at Vegeta and let out a small noise.

" He's gonna be here when you get back. The Ouji's ALWAYS gonna be here when you get back. Forever and ever and

ever. " Chi-Chi grimaced at the thought.

The larger saiyajin gave the smaller one one last tight glomp, then sadly waddled out the front door, followed by

Chi-Chi. He paused as Chi-Chi passed him and spun around to see Vegeta still hadn't moved from his spot in the living room,

" Veh-gee.. "

Vegeta looked up at him, " I'm fine Kakarrotto, nothing to worry about. " he sweatdropped, holding his hands up

infront of him. Goku sniffled, " Go on now, go home to your earthling family, the fusions and I will be alright. "

" I--care about you, Veggie. " Goku said, staring at him intensely.

" Will you get in the car! " Chi-Chi pulled Goku into the passanger's seat and closed the door behind him.

" But, I thought you came here on Kinto'un? " Goku looked confused.

" I did. " she pointed behind him.

Goku looked over his shoulder to see Kinto'un in the backseat. The little orange cloud waved to him. Goku smiled

weakly and waved back.

" I de-stress myself easier when I drive home instead of fly. Feels more like I'm accomplishing something. " she

muttered, then started the car and drove off.

Goku stared at the ImitationTummy3000 which lay at his feet, " Veggie...I wish it'd been real. "

" You can't wish that, its against Rule #5. " Chi-Chi said astutely.

" ... " Goku was silent.

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" ... " Vegeta stood there, staring out the open doorway.

" Well that was rude of her, not to mention a terrible injustice. "

Vegeta turned to see Turles hovering there.

The evil type-3 saiyajin grinned wickedly at him, " We should go seek out revenge upon her for tricking you and then

find a way to get you pregnant for real! "

" WAH! " Vegeta fell over, " WHY WOULD I WANNA GET PREGNANT "FOR REAL"!? " he snapped.

" I happen to think you'd really enjoy motherhood, and I happen to have a few "sources" to support that theory. "

Turles smirked, pointing to the part of his head where the brain normally stores memory.

" Well I don't! " the ouji looked away.

" Vegeta? " Bulma asked him, concerned, " Are you alright? "

" Of course I am, I'm fine. I just told Kakarrotto that I can't see why you're worried. " Vegeta walked over and

closed the front door, " The Great and Powerful Saiyajin no Ouji can brush off something as simple as a trick. Infact I'm not

affected by it in the least! "

Bulma watched him sympathetically.

" Well, now that that's done and over with I'm going to go get my tank-top back on and go train. I haven't done so

in almost a week--the gravity room must be getting dusty by now. " he said with a slight laugh as he walked up the stairs to

his room and closed the door behind him.

" Poor Vegeta-san. " Turles frowned.

" Mommy.. "

" Toussan.. " Vejitto and Gogeta looked equally hurt.

" Vegeta? " Bulma dashed up the stairs after him, and knocked on the door, then after a moment opened it.

Vegeta wasn't putting his tank-top on. Infact he hadn't even gotten it out. The little ouji sat in the middle of his

bed hugging onto his stomach, his real stomach, tightly.

" Oh Vegeta-- "

Would you like to hold 'um?

The ouji shuddered.

Bulma climbed up onto the bed with him and held him tightly.

_::I'm fine.::_ Vegeta said in his mind, _::I'm fine, I'm oh-kay. Nothing's wrong. I'm alright. I didn't need to have a_

_baby__. I didn't want to have a baby. I'm fine. Absolutely positively fine. Why would I want to have Kakarrotto's BABY?_

_There's__ so many things, wrong, with that. The Great and Powerful Saiyajin no Ouji give birth. Become a Mommy. Raise some_

_smelly__ little kaka-baby with the head Kaka-germ himself. That's so non-platonic, BLAH! I'd probably have to change its_

_diaper__ and feed it baby-food and give it its own room and buy a crib and plush toys and little baby-outfits and take it to_

_the__ park and teach it to speak my native language and teach it everything I know...teach it about my home. And train it in_

_the__ gravity room--its ki would probably be unbelievably advanced with its lineage and it'd probably be the youngest super_

_saiyajin__ to ever exist--younger than Goten even. I'd teach it how to cook and play video-games against it in my free time._

_And it would probably grow up to be taller than me like all my other children are going to be--I just know it. And I'd end up_

_loving__ it and doing anything for it like I did for Trunks back when I fought Buu.....Buu, that was the same day Vejitto was_

_born__ wasn't it? Well, either way, I don't need nor want any part in the National Seed Bank of Kakarrotto! 'Would I like to_

_hold__ 'um?' BAH!::_

dl

/dl

dl

/dl

" Here you go Gohan! One ImitationTummy3000! " Chi-Chi held out the object victoriously.

Gohan took it from her, " Thanks Kaasan. Say, why is Toussan moping in the kitchen like that? "

" Oh its nothing. The Ouji just got him upset, he's fine. " Chi-Chi laughed nervously, then lightly pushed Gohan out

of the house, " Off you go now! "

" Huh? " Gohan looked back, " But Kaasan-- "

" Bye Gohan! Give me a call once you and Videl have confirmed you've conceived the first of my many grandchildren! "

she said cheerfully, then closed the door behind her.

Gohan stood there at the front door, staring at it, " Toussan. I wish I could believe you about him, Kaasan. " he

said, worried. He contemplated trying to go back inside, then decided it would be better if he just went home and called

Goku's cellphone from there instead.

Goten hopped onto his seat at the kitchen table and watched Goku as he flipped through the papers he had drawn his

"story" on a couple weeks ago.

Goku pulled out the final drawing--the one with him, Vegeta in the little blue gi, Vejitto, and Gogeta standing

infront of the Son home smiling. Goku smiled back at it, then took out his colored pencils and drew something in Vegeta's

arms. He stared at the picture, grinning, " And they lived happily ever after, Goten. "

Goten smiled.

* * *

12:40 AM 12/11/2004

THE END!

Vegeta: (to Chu) Before I say anything else I must thank you for the semetastic dream sequence in the opening half of the

chapter.

Chuquita: (sweatdrops) Well I kinda felt sorry for you; after all the whole uke thing upsets you and you've been in uke-ish

situations for at least the past 4 fics including this one.

Vegeta: (relieved) Hai, I was starting to worry there was a trend that'd been pushing me in the opposite direction since the

whole "Kakarrotto learns what an oujo is" thing was over.

Chuquita: (pokes the side of her head) Outside sources Veggie..the subconsious mind's like a sponge.

Vegeta: (grins) And luckily you haven't seen or read anything that puts me into an even remotely uke-ish position today!

(clasps his hands together) Your sister should hog the im'ing device more often!

Chuquita: (sweatdrops) ...

Vegeta: I suppose I can retrieve the super-earmuffs now, huh? (happily takes them back from Chu and Goku) Haha! I LOVE the

scent of VICTORY! And non-ukeness! YES!

Chuquita: (even larger sweatdrops) ...

Goku: (sniffles) POOR VEGGIE'S BABY! (▫sob▫)

Vegeta: (pats him on the shoulder) Aw, no need to cry, Kakarrotto. Afterall there wasn't even a baby to begin with.

Goku: But, but you were so SAD when you found out it wasn't real and I knew all along and it HURT SO BAD! (glomps Veggie for

comfort)

Vegeta: (uneasy) K--Kakarrotto I knew about there being no baby, well here anyway, I just didn't know in the fic.

Goku: (stops bawling) ...how DOES that work anyway?

Chuquita: (confused) I'm not really sure...

Vegeta: Well I certainly don't know so I'm not really surprised.

Chuquita: (perks up) Let's get on to the reviewer-replies, shall we?

Vegeta: (smirks) Good idea.

To Hakura0: Yup! Veggie's really upset but doesn't want to let it on because that would mean he would've actually wanted the

baby afterall. The dream isn't part of fic 100, but it does foreshadow Goku's reaction to something that does happen in the

fic. LOL! I have to think up an offical name for it though. Something catchy. I added up all the fics chapters and it would

turn out ridiculously long; a 295 chapter fic! O.O

To tea: Thanks! Aw, happy you like him :) Poor Veggie, he was confused. That play was really fun to write, I was laughing

while writing it. Goku's a lil confused as well.

To dglsprincess105: Welcome back! :) Hee— I'd say this is Veggie's 2nd worst nightmare. There's one thing worse that could

happen to him 'n Goku from Veggie's point of view, and that would be them falling in non-platonic love with each other.

Yup! Pan's coming up. I almost had a sub-plot where Goku, Veggie, and Bulma go down to otherworld and asked around instead

of having Vejitto just call up Enma and ask him, but then I figured "Veggie's going through enough as it is, does he really

need Freeza, Cell, and his parents to see him pregnant with Goku's baby?", felt sorry for him, and decided not to do it.

Looking back on it, I think I might have let Chi-Chi get off too easy, but if Veggie had shown her he was upset and angry

at the fact that he wasn't having Goku's baby, well that would lead to non-platonic implications and he'd trap himself in a

corner. Oh I can't wait to get to fic 100! I have **lots** of stuff planned for it!

To PerfectCell17: Lol! Baby shower for Veggie! So happy you like him! The play was fun, the idea came randomly to me. Sorta

like this-

_"Guy singing boringly": la la blah blah..._

_"Chu wearing mittens to keep warm, tries to prevent bordom and decides to move mitten up and down in-sync with the guy's_

_voice__ so it looks like its singing": (muffled giggles) Heeheehee... (stops moving the mitten before she bursts into laughter)_

▫_Idea for the entire scene with Turles' Sock-puppet-play smacks __Chu__ in the back of the head_▫

_Chu__": O.O OMG! I must write that once I get home! (grins excitedly):::_

Poor Veggie indeed, the entire pregnancy thing scares and worries him so much. He'll think of a way to get back at Onna in

the next fic.

To CerisaTempest: So glad you liked it! Hee— the fusions get to be the stars of the next fic, actually. Poor Veggie, that

invention had to be super high-tech in order to trick him. Thanks! :)

To Jyae: Sadly not in the current foreseeable future. They do have lots of brothers and sisters in the (for lack of a better

name) Kayka Timeline who appeared in "Happy Ever After" early last year though.

To Chibi Mirai Gogeta: Thanks so much! Ooh, if you do draw a picture of that could you send me a link to it? :) He got over

it rather easily, what with his attention span and the stronger need to help Veggie with his "baby". You guessed correctly!

Veggie went into denial over it!

To GogetaJr: LOL! Veggie'd be in trouble then. Glad you liked the play. Hai, poor Goku's under so many rules. Actually there

was a Veku at one point, but that was waaaaaaaaaaay back in mid-2001 when my fic-continuity was shakier (when you'd end at

one place and start up again in the next fic without complete closure and continuity consisted of mentioning previous

incidents and one previous character reappearance). I like the name Veku too though :) Since it was so long ago I could

technically still use the name for something else. Yup! Turles luvs to trick the others. Lol! That's oh-kay. That line was

Veggie checking with Bulma to make sure she knows he doesn't have any non-platonic feelings for Goku. Aww. Hurry Goku!

Haha, carrots :)

To Santa Shimi!: LOL! It took Goku that long to notice Veggie figured out he was watching him. Yup, I've seen it and most of

the recent season 8 (8?) eps. No favorite character though. It's more the funny situations they're put in. Ah! A fic in the

review! The Central shows it from time to time late at night. I've seen it in chunks but never all the way

through. Heh, I've never read a South Park fic before so I actually have no idea what's going to happen next. Interesting

setup though, I'm curious to see what happened to Kyle.

To SSJ5Gogetto: Thanks so much! :D

To orchideater: I'll know in 2 weeks! My current ps2 is broken and I get the new one on Christmas :D From what I've heard Budoukai 3 is a LOT of fun. I'm so excited and can't wait to play it! I also bought this special dbz joystick controller with super-huge buttons and joystick because I've heard certain finishing moves are very joystick-oriented. Heh, I've been playing video-games forever. I only use my ps2 and gba, but I have an old nes (still works if I hook it up correctly), genesis, N64, and gameboy color also. I'm afraid that a live-action movie would come out really awkward, especially with who they would choose to play Goku and Veggie. I think my own expectations of what they would look like in real-life are too high (sweatdrops). I did hear that the people in Polar Express came out looking awkward cuz of the technique they used. A traditionally animated brand new dbz movie would be GREAT! I really hope Toei does one, with dbz's anniversary coming up 'n all. I'd love to see something new with Goku 'n Veggie in it! Aw thanks. Poor Goku, so easily influenced by Turles' manipulation. Heh, Veggie was terrified. Thanks! I like that explanation. LOL! What Veggie would have to do conquer that fear would be hilarious. Ah. Well Yamcha conquered his fear. :)

To Queen Phoenix: Thanks so much! Format changes...um, I'm single-spacing the Corner again :D (single-space was taken off of a while ago and recently came back) and the ▫ and – signs are there because the signs I used to use now get erased thanks to QuickEdit :( I'm glad you both like the fic!

To SupersayiankingTommy: Wow, lots of forms. Slightly confusing yet cool :D No third fusion-baby though. I'm not sure what the baby would be called. New fusion baby! Here's the chapter!

Chuquita: And so the fic comes to an end.

Vegeta: (sighs with relief)

Chuquita: (grins) Up next is fic #98! The Fusions/4th Christmas Special!

Vejitto: HOORAY!

Gogeta: YAY! We get to be the main main characters again instead of just regular main ones!

Chuquita: Also, Turles discovers mistletoe!

Goku: Ah. (nods)

Vegeta: (pales) Perhaps I should hide out during the next fic..

Chuquita: (grins) Aw don't be silly Veggie! We need you for the next fic! Besides you get a fun surprise!

Vegeta: Really?

Chuquita: Yup!

Vegeta: Fun as in fun for me or fun for Kakarrotto?

Chuquita: For you.

Vegeta: ... (smirks) In that case I shall stick around.

Chuquita: (grins) My finals start this week! Wish me luck!

Goku: (to audiance) (waves) See you sometime next week! Byebye!


End file.
